Today! I told myself. Today is the day, I tell her how I felt. I couldn’t seem to understand how someone in few days can become so significant part of your life, mind and body that life seems pointless just thinking about without their presence. She was like that. She would be surrounded be her friends all the time, pack of two girls and these two ugly guys. And I’ve never seen two guys grovel more, those retards will do as she pleased. Maybe I was jealous that those retards got to talk to her, be around her presence. She was a beauty, with her brown eyes, curly hair and chiseled chin.Out of the world. Every day she would reach late in class, and I would see her walk right past me. I felt like I was invisible in her eyes. I didn’t had such super powers. I didn’t even had any powers.
We were in Bachelors of Commerce in Delhi University, year of 1999. I have no idea how I got there, I wasn’t even that good with the studies, don’t get me wrong, but I was just an average student with average looks. But I loved to read and play piano, I had been practicing playing piano for more than four years by then. I remember exactly how I got into playing piano. It was my final exams of class 9th and I was listening to these cassettes for some entertainment and I came across this song called “Nostalgia” by Yanni, and it freaked me out how amazing it was, that song took over my mind for so many days. I would be in quiescence every time I heard that sound of piano. From that day, all I wanted to do was, be that guy who took over everyone’s mind with his music. I joined music lessons the day after I finished my exams. I can’t tell you how many times I practiced playing Nostalgia. My parents would enter my room all worked up in the middle of the night. Best days ever, and now I was sitting here in the back seat, hoping to catch her attention and there was nothing I could do.
Our college had a fest in the winters. I was performing. She took part in the classical dance. The day of fest, and the moment I saw her in the auditorium, my jaw dropped down to the floor and came back where it belonged. She wore a simple orange saree, with henna on her hands and feet. I really didn’t cared about who was winning the dance competition, she was already my future wife, in my mind. I stopped my practice and took the seats in the auditorium as she practiced her dance with the other dancers and the moment she started dancing. She could have challenged Madhuri Dixit and beat her just by her face. She looked stunning. Funny thing is although they were playing a classic music number. In my mind, I could hear the Beatles song “You’ve got to hide your love” but I couldn’t. I know it sounds pathetic at each and every level. But I was head over heels crazy about his women, and very few people can understand this emotion. When you look at someone and your heart skips a beat and you get the feeling, you know this person, some how from somewhere. Even if you don’t get to be with them because somehow you feel like they are too good for you. I was on that path, and nobody even knew how miserable I was.
Anyways, it was one hour to go before the show begun. Somehow, I kept myself calm. I wasn’t scared to perform on stage by the way, I had done that before. I didn’t wanted to mess it up in front of her. Her dance performance began, I was at the backstage, peaking through the side and above shoulder of some guy, and I was blown away by her dance, and that face, twice in a single day.
When my time to perform came. I was calm and relaxed, and the only thing I hoped for and looked for was her in the crowd. And all I could see was few friends and the college professors in the front row. I began with “Fur Elise” by Beethoven, it’s a classic and I slowly took a transition into “Nostalgia” by Yanni and I had my one eye on the crowd as I constantly looked for her and I couldn’t see her, but secretly I hoped she was listening.
And the crowd cheer made me so ecstatic I got lost in the Nostalgia, and when I opened my eyes, as I took a glance at the right…She was standing behind this guy, all the time. A fluttery and a strange sensation passed through my stomach, butterflies I guess and I felt for the first time in months I had her attention. She was looking at me. I closed my eyes as I went from “Nostalgia” to “My heart will go on”, from Titanic and I played it with all my heart, I played like my life depended on it. As, I was about to finish, She was staring to me, her eyes were wide open and they gleamed. She had a smile on her face, and I could never ever forget that smile. You know how they say when you die, your life flashes in front of your eyes, when that will happen, her smile would be the first thing that will flash before me. And that smile meant something, I knew it right there.
It’s been more than 12 years since we’re married. I wish I passed away before she did.
“And this is how I fell in love with your mother,” I told my daughter.
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