It was a cold monday, the first day of 1979. January the first. Christmas had gone by and it had been a drag. Aweful. It hadn't been a good christmas for Sid either. It hadn'treally been a good life for Sid since october, not that it had been a very good like then either, Johnny thought. That was when he was her. He couldn't believe it. But there she stood, like in the old days. But it was diffrent now. She was properly dressed, not punked. She wasnt a punk, no longer Johnny Rotten's little sister.
Sid saw on Johnny, he sneered at his sister. Sid saw on her. He'd miss her, a lot. He loved her, almost as much as he did with Nancy. Maybe more. Sure, this girl was a pain in the ass, but she was also the kind of girl you just wanted around you. Well, the only reason she had been a pain in the ass was that she'd looked after him all the time.
"Johnny?" she asked, slightly shocked, it looked. Sid saw on Johnny, which nodded, but yet in a rather sour way. Sid knew that Johnny didn't like her, and he surely wouldn't like her better now that she, at least on looks, hadnt turned into one of those 'normal' people.
The girl gulped, and forced a fake smile. "Long time, no see." she said, then she turned to Sid, as if she hadn't noticed him before. "Sid." she said, still in an clearly bitter way. She still was mad. But Sid understood. He had after all just left her, after everything they had been through. Left her for Nancy. Sid got dizzy and wanted to throw up just thinking about Nancy. He'd loved her, he loved her so awefully much. And despite what people said, he didn't kill her. He would never have the heart to kill anyone, and clearly not someone he loved like Nancy.
"Now, would you both be kind and get out of my way." she said, in an formal way. She had changed, but still, the attitude was there, locked inside her. Johnny was angry, even though he should be proud. She wasn't herself anymore. She was someone else. Johnny brushed past her, but Sid looked unsure, as he always did when it came to making choices. He wanted to talk with her. Ask her about everything. But still, he always followed Johnny. Especially now. Johnny looked after him, even though they hadn't talked since The Pistols split untill after Nancy's death. After that Johnny had been around the broken Sid almost all the time, fearing that he might do something fucked up, like when he tried taking suicide and Johnny knew that he would do it again if he got the chance.
Sid, confused, looked down on the ground and followed Johnny. After some minutes of walking, Sid turned his head to see the girl turn the cornor, the dyed black hair swaying slightly in the wind. Unknown to Sid, Johnny also turned his head, only slightly to see his sister disapear, and deep down he hated it.
~*~*~
"Why are you mad?" Sid suddenly asked, looking as if he just really wanted to jump around even though he was sitting in a chair, his short nails scratching in the fabric of the old chair. His feet were drumming on the floor. He was a wreck, and had been ever since the night Nancy got killed.
"Her." Johnny answered blankly, glaring at a clean spot on the rather messy floor of Johnny and Sid's place.
"I want her back..." Sid said in an almost unhearble voice making Johnny look at him almost shocked even though he would not want to show more than coldness. He wanted to tell him to never even go near her again. Not cause he was bad for her, or her for him. Cause he knew they needed each other, but he wouldn't want to forgive her. He felt selfish for being so angry at her, but he couldn't help it. She'd becomed one of those that he hated the most. The kind that always followed the crowd. Mindless sheeps. She'd left her personality. The annoying personality that could drive him to insanity.
"You'll never catch me!" Johnny heard his sister yell to the cops chacing her down the streets, as she run, holding the stolen jeans, leather jacket and t-shirt tightly in her hands. Johnny shoke his head, while Sid was grinning, proud of the girl. They was a dating and everyone knew it.. Johnny did never want to show how happy he was over the fact that they were. Then he could look after both of them. Though, countless times walking into his place, okay, not only his place, witnessing the idiot making out with his little sister. Bloody hurting his eyes. He would defiantly not know how mature their relationship actually was.
"No!" Johnny said, almost snapping, okay, he did snap at Sid, making the black haired guy frown slightly, clearly not understanding why Johnny was angry.
"Cause she's, she's not one of us anymore! She's one of those stuck up morons that follows the crowd. Not having opinions anymore." Johnny explained his, at times, almost retarded friend, which now nodded slowly, obiviously not sharing the same opinion as Johnny.
Rotten watched his best friend fall into this silence he so often came into, a silence he often come to these days. His thoughts wandered off. Sometimes it made him do stupid things, other times it made him less fucked up. Sid had known she was angry, Sherri Lydon, otherwise known as Cherry Lydon or even at times Cherry Rotten. It depended on where she had to use her name. He bet that she used Sherri Lydon now. She had been angry and upset when he chose Nancy over her, but he had his reasons. She'd hidden something for him, being all secret against him which he dreaded. Felt as if he wasn't good enough for her, emotionally and pfysically. Didn't satisfie her enough. But he did, didn't he? He had, she'd liked it. Maybe she was pretending. Sid had from the moment he catched the uncertainty in her, thought she was cheating on him. Fuckin' another bloke behind his back.
Johnny, growing tired of watching Sid be like that, got up, putting a cigg between his lips, looking on Sid, which was looking lost, the whole guy shaking. Rotten shoke his head before leaving the flat walking down to the streets, smoking while kicking in a little rock on the ground walking around in deep thoughts. It had happened so much these last years. The Band, His Sister, Everything. It had been so much going on.
As he was thinking he failed to notice the person walking against him and when he crashed in her, he looked up on her with a glare, but the moment he saw his little sister his expression softened in few seconds before gaining the glare once more.
"Move." he spat, making her frown slightly before sighing quietly, trying to not let him hear it. Though he did making him glare even more.
"What?" he snapped, yet, beneath the tempered voice of his a soft layer of worry could be heard. But it was few people that could actually recongize that layer. Sherri was one of those.
"It wasn't my fault you know, there was reasons. I couldn't stay here anymore." she said and got that well known sneer from him.
"Just because you and Sid didn't work out you didn't need to leave." he once more snapped, making Sherri look down on the ground. She wanted to tell him, to tell him the real reason that she'd just left. She'd made to hide it for years and only god knows how she made it without Johnny noticing. It was a shock that Sid didn't notice it, and it was even more shocking that her own brother didn't. But when Sid had chosen Nancy, she didn't find any reason to live there and she took Victoria and left England to live in Scotland. She remembered so well Sid's confusion. He didn't seem to catch everything so well. He'd begged her to stay but couldn't answer why she had to stay. He didn't have any answers for that one.
"He was on heroin! I couldn't watch him like that....." Sherri almost shouted, but kept her voice hissed.
"You was the one keeping things from him. You let him down, he took Nancy." Johnny said, and deep down, behind that shell of coldness he knew what he said was harsh, too harsh for him even.
"You're his best friend. You should have stopped him. You shouldn't have intruduced him to her!" she sneered at him, being pissed at her older brother. And she had the rights to be as well...He did after let him meet her. But Johnny wouldn't admitt it, not now.
Johnny walked past her, glaring in the street. He didn't understand it. He didn't find the reason. Sure Sid was some of it but she'd never let any guy break her like that, make her run away. What was she hiding from them? What had he been too blind to see?
