Out of a Vacant Heart: A Band of Brothers Fanfiction

Haguenau

Before they were pulled out, one of the doggies from the 79th Infantry had given her a brand new Army commissioned scarf. Cate tightened it around her neck as she walked, her steps hugging the jagged remains of the store fronts that lined the broken pavement.

There would be plenty of noise if something from the German railroad gun was incoming from across the river, though it might not matter if she sought cover or not. Nurses could become casualties as easily as soldiers in a place like Haguenau. Over the last few months, she had seen colleagues catch ricochets from mortars out in the open while others were crushed to death hunkered down in ruined basements.

It was all the luck of the draw. Or fate perhaps, depending on what you believed. Cate didn't know what she believed in anymore.

Turning the corner, Cate drew her gaze up from her scuffed boots. She had heard the trucks earlier in the day. She recognized some of the faces in the crowd gathered around the makeshift showers, like visions from a past life or faraway dream. No one at the field hospital had mentioned that it was the 101st Airborne moving into Haguenau.

She halted hard in the middle of a puddle of icy water. Her memory tore her back to those few months in England. Faces, names, and ranks all melded into a sunlit mesh of foliage green and white toothed smiles.

Pints had been bought for her and the other nurses at the local pub. Mira and Joan were the most popular with their brazen New York City attitudes. Mousy Catherine Doyle was from New Hampshire, painfully shy and naive. Too naive, perhaps.

Cate scanned the crowd of men, dreading it was the 2nd Battalion of the 506th. The men were in rough shape. She could only guess the slice of hell they had been handed since those honeyed days in Aldbourne. Ragged shells of men milled towards the steaming tents sucking on their cigarettes and gritting their teeth. Cate carefully pulled away, ducking back from the street and setting her back flat against the building.

She studied the street leading to where she was quartered. It was far enough away from the river to avoid the sights of snipers, but they occasionally had to take cover below the splintering staircase when shells fell. Danger had become so common place, she didn't shudder anymore when explosions shook the earth.

Only a few of the men in clean uniforms, their damp hair steaming in the cold air, ambled out into the street. She didn't recognize any of them. Cate kept her head down, covering her frayed brown waves with the scarf. Her eyes on the ground, she barreled towards the stairs leading up to their quarters. She exhaled her held breath through her nose as she climbed the first couple concrete steps.

"Excuse me, nurse?"

She froze. Swallowing hard, she stopped, but did not turn.

"Yes?"

"I'm looking for the field hospital, you wouldn't happen to know where it is?"

She knew his voice, though it was coated in gritty exhaustion. There was an edge to him that had not been there before when they had met in England. Of all the people to happen upon her in Haguenau, of course Corporal Don Malarkey would have to be the one. Cate sighed, her breath turning to diaphanous plumes in the musky twilight. She turned and peered down at him.

Don was altogether a different man from the one she remembered. Just as astonished, he climbed the first step, laying his hand on the iron railing. His jaw dropped as he smoothed his fingers over his wet hair.

Heavy lines etched his brow, a vacancy in his hickory brown eyes and a thick layer of ruddy scruff lining his jaw. Moreover, his shoulders bent under an unseen weight. She refused to muse why.

"Catie Doyle?" He gaped and made a move to take another step up, but stopped when she visibly pulled away. "How- How did you get here?"

"We were moved with the 79th Infantry, but stayed behind after they left." Cate tugged her scarf down her forehead and let her gaze drop. "I'm not sure when we are getting moved out again."

"But I- we haven't seen your corps since England."

"Yes, we were deployed soon after D-Day."

"I remember you were gone when we returned." His voice faded at the end as though recalling the moment. "We didn't know they would send you girls off so soon."

A high pitched whistle cut through the quiet, early evening. A shell from across the river sailed into the ruins of the city. She backed up a step, Don moved more swiftly.

"Get low!"

He pushed her up the rest of the steps into the outcropping of the doorway. The two of them crouched, Don shoving Cate into the corner. He shielded her, his back hunched as the shell hit the building across the street. With her arms knitted over her head, she peered past his shoulder as roof tiles cascaded down onto the road. A jeep that hadn't stopped in time skidded out of the way and harmlessly into a wall of sand bags.

A moment of silence passed. Cate relaxed as no more shells were fired.

She let her arms drop with an audible exhale. Don hung his head, his arms resting on his knees as he rubbed his face with the heel of his hand. His hands were trembling. His face lifted. Even in the shadows, his exhaustion was clearly more than just physical. A palpable weariness penetrated to his heart.

Impulsively, she took his hand as he had first taken hers all those months earlier. She ran a thumb over his worn knuckles.

"I wish I had been able to tell you goodbye before we left for Europe," she whispered, meeting his eyes with a sad twinge around her chapped lips.

"Me too."

The moment of vulnerability faded and the edge he had acquired returned as he let go of her hand and stood. He walked over to the edge of the step and looked over at the wreck of the jeep, the driver wandering away from it, bewildered by his luck. Cate pushed herself to her feet.

"Do you have orders for tonight?"

"Not until later." His shoulders visibly stiffened at the memory.

Cate stood next to him. Watercolor shades of coin grey and mauve poured into the river water in the distance.

"Could you meet me here in a half hour?"

Don snorted and glanced over at her. The side of her mouth lifted as she shrugged.

"I can try. Why?"

"I'll see you back here then." Cate turned and walked into the building.