The Decision

Chapter 5

Lexa walked through her door and tried to push her thoughts about Bellamy aside. She wasn't going to allow herself to get lost in his words. Not about Clarke and certainly not about her parents. She had meant what she said, she really had no intentions of seeing Clarke, it just, happened. As suspicious as it might have seemed, it was totally unintentional. She hadn't picked the restaurant for the repast, hell, she hadn't even wanted the damn thing.

Lexa let out a sigh of frustration as she dropped down onto the couch. She needed to stop thinking about these things. She needed to stop thinking about Clarke. All that she was doing was hurting herself more. Clarke had done exactly what she had hoped that she would. She moved on. She got over it and went on with her life.

Well, maybe not completely over it, obviously she was still angry, but she had at least been able to get over her. Some part of her was able to heal and move forward to find love again.

Lexa ran her fingers though her hair briskly and stood up. Clarke was engaged. She couldn't help but hope that whoever Clarke was engaged to treated her well. That they were kind and considerate and understood her. That they just accepted her for whose was, unlike some people, unlike Finn.

Lexa shuddered slightly, slowly remembering the night that she was grateful to be in the right place, at the right time.

*********************************************************************************************

"I can explain." Lexa heard Finn say and she froze on the spot.
"You can explain?" Clarke responded, sounding slightly sarcastic. "Okay Finn, explain."

Lexa silently cursed herself. She should have been here sooner, but she'd gotten caught up working on a paper and now Clarke was standing there talking to Finn. God, he was an asshole. Just the fact that he actually thought that he could explain himself was laughable. She was conflicted now, to go or to stay. She knew that she shouldn't be listening to this, it was private, but at the same time, she didn't trust Finn and she didn't want Clarke to alone with him. Her protectiveness of Clarke easily won out, so she stayed.

"I was a dick," he began, "and I'm sorry that I hit you. I didn't mean to – you know that I didn't."
"I know that you didn't," Clarke admitted, "but, you were trying to hit Bellamy."
"He was being an ass," Finn defended.
"So were you!" Clarke fired back instantly. "You hurt Monty. Monty! He's never been anything but nice to you."
"I just," Finn paused. "I didn't want him touching me."
"Because he fucked another guy?" Clarke sounded like she was about to loose her nerve.
"Yes!" Finn replied quickly. "It's fucking gross, Clarke, not to mention wrong."
"Really?" Clarke's shot out. "Because you didn't seem to mind the thought of me and another woman sleeping together."
"That's different," Finn sighed dramatically.
"Fucking Christ," Clarke breathed.
"But still, you're not like them," Finn said, practically stifling laugh.
"Not like them?" Clarke asked quickly.
"Gay," Finn responded immediately.

Lexa rolled her eyes. This idiot. Obviously Clarke wasn't gay.

"Oh, for fucks sake, Finn," Clarke already sounded annoyed. "I know that I'm not gay."
"I know, right?" Finn actually laughed.
"I think I've heard enough," Clarke said after a short silence and Lexa could almost feel her shaking her head.
"No, wait," Finn responded quickly. "I've thought about this and I really think that you just need to give yourself some space from all of them. Come stay with me. I'll help you and take care of you."
"Help me?" Clarke scoffed. "Finn, I don't need you to take care of me or help me. I know exactly who I am."
"Clearly, you don't," Finn's tone seemed harder. "I know you. I've been with you and you're not like them."
"Finn, stop," Clarke voice was firm.
"You just need to trust me," Finn told her.
"Finn," Clarke's voice seemed more concerned.
"I can help you." Something in Finn's voice changed and it made Lexa's blood run cold. "Just, let me remind you."
"Finn." Clarke's voice sounded more strangled. "Finn, what are you doing? Stop. Stop!"

Lexa quickly rounded the corner and her eyes went wide. Finn had Clarke pushed back against the wall with one hand on one of her wrists and the other on her hip, dipping dangerously into her waistband. Clarke had a white knuckled grip on his hand and was trying desperately to twist out of his grip.

Lexa saw red. She rushed forward, colliding with Finn's side and knocking him away from Clarke. "Have you lost your mind?"
Finn recovered quickly and shook his head as his eyes fell on her. "You stupid bitch," he sneered, before taking a swing.
Lexa sidestepped it and pushed him away again. "Just get the hell out of here," she spat at him.
"I'm not going anywhere," Finn spat as he took another swipe at her.
This time he'd barely missed and with all of the effort she had, Lexa pushed him back again. She wanted to hurt him, really she did, but in that moment she was afraid that if she started, she wasn't going to stop.

Out of the corner of her eye she noticed a group of people crossing though the parking lot quickly. Someone had heard them.

Finn's knuckles suddenly connected with her cheekbone and instantly she thought that her eye was going to explode. That was it. Lexa stepped forward, easily landing three quickly blows before Finn even realized what had happened. He stumbled backwards and was caught by a man that Lexa didn't recognize.

Lexa stood staring at him with her chest heaving.
"Are you alright?" The man questioned quickly.
"He," Lexa swallowed hard. "He tried to hurt my friend," she said, motioning behind herself.
The man looked behind her to where Clarke was standing and nodded. He pushed Finn to the ground and pulled out his cellphone.

Lexa's mind was spinning out into space, but she was quickly brought back to the earth by two arms wrapping around her from behind and squeezing hard. Clarke.

Lexa gripped her arm assuringly, but found that she couldn't speak.
Clarke increased her grip and sobbed against her back. "Thank you," she whispered.

******************************************************************************************

Lexa shook her head angrily as she moved through her apartment.

Her parents had been furious with her for getting involved that night. They'd gone up one side of her and down the other, screaming about how she needed to learn how to mind her own business, but Lexa didn't care. Clarke was her friend and there was no way that she could have just stood by and ignored what was happening. There was no way that she could have stood by and let him hurt her or anyone else for that matter.

Clarke was visibly shaken and clearly embarrassed by the whole thing, but she bounced back in time and Finn withdrew from school shortly thereafter. Things returned to normal, or rather, a new type of normal because somehow that night had managed to bring her and Clarke even closer together. They became practically inseparable, spending all of their free time together and crashing at each other's places regularly. It was strange, but felt completely normal at the same time.

Lexa walked into the kitchen and set her kettle to boil, she needed to relax and to calm her nerves. There was no point in getting angry about things that had happened almost a decade ago. It was over, it was done.

She leaned back against the counter, watching the flames from her stove licking at the bottom of the kettle and sighed, trying to think about anything else, anything but Clarke.

She had never felt a connection with anyone the way the she did with Clarke. Though they were absolute polar opposites, somehow when they came together a perfect balance was created. It was comfortable, it was easy, it was special. It was a friendship that could have rivaled friendships and it made Lexa feel safer than she ever had before.

As the kettle began to scream Lexa shook herself from her thoughts, she wasn't doing this. She wasn't going to torture herself with the memories of something that was long gone. Stepping forward she quickly flipped off the stove and walked out of the room. It was over, things had changed and what was done couldn't be undone. Grabbing her keys, Lexa quickly made her way out the door, slamming it as she went.

She stepped into the elevator and slammed her fist against the lobby button. She needed to get away, before the walls closed in on her even further. She needed to clear her head and remember that everything was the way that it was because it had to be. It had to be. She made the only choice that she could and it was the right one.

When the doors finally opened, Lexa quickly stepped out, pushing her wild waves out of her face and making her way to the door, but quickly froze when her eyes fell on an all too familiar face. Clarke.

She felt her shoulders square and her jaw become set.

What fresh hell was this?