Bitter

the Fire to Desire (1)

‼️warning‼️
     This chapter includes very disturbing and painful scenes that includes self harm, if you do not read to wish, skip over this chapter

-Laan💕

Baby I can feel your pain,
Even if you're a thousand miles away

     Baby I remember those days, where loneliness was right infront your face

I can erase those pains, no more loneliness staring in ya face

     -gyptian

Kenai

Dear Diary,
  Sometimes I'm up. And when I'm up I feel like their is nothing in my way, but when I'm down. I'm so far below the ground no one can see.
      You're expected to be happy when you have things, but can money truly buy happiness?
     I've been living to die since I was born, and sometimes I feel like I should be dying to live but all I want is for it to end.
Sometimes those wounds don't heal. They burn and sit in your heart until it's only fire.

But why me? Why do the good get hurt so bad? Why do broken souls try to heal evil spirits?

- K

Tossing my diary under my pillow, I laid back as my music seeped out of the speaker beside me. Letting out a few deep breaths I wiped my tears and lit a spliff and inhaled slow. As my chest began to burn from the weed, I blew out slow , making my way over to my full body mirror.

As I stare into this glass reflection of me, I see nothing  but emptiness. A broken sad fat girl, how cliche. Running my hands over my body I continue to stare as the tears continue to flow.

Growing angrier by the second I grabbed anything near me and aimed for the mirror watching it shatter and drop to the floor like the last piece of life I had in me.

(Now in third person)

As Kenai continued to sob in utter emotional distress she began knocking everything off of her dressers, vanity and desk, throwing objects at every price of glass in sight.

After minutes of not only damaging herself, punching her wall and breaking things, her room was distorted. As she looked around her room, kenai dropped to her knees, placing her face in her bloody hands and cried for what seemed like hours.

"Why can't I be free?"

🙇🏽‍♀️poor baby, her first emotional break down. Should I continue?