little did we know

Ella 4

I hardly break from one entry to another. This notebook of mine is fascinating. It's like a glimpse into the past, a chance to see the forgotten history.

April 29th

More training today. This time it was climbing. They told us to scramble up a rock wall as fast as we could while they pelted us with water balloons. Fun right? They didn't even care that Katelyn was gone. No break from practice. It's like they didn't even notice.

What they didn't tell us about the wall was that it moved. The hand and feet holds shifted around the surface while we were grabbing them. The wall itself was like a massive treadmill, slowly moving down towards the ground. And, if we didn't reach the top of the wall before the one minute timer ran out, the hand holds would slowly sink into the 50 foot tall climbing wall. If you were high up when the grips disappeared, odds are you will fall, possibly breaking bones. Maybe even death.

I'll be honest, I'm scared. All this training is tough. Why do we need to go through it? What does Maris have planned?

She says she needs us to deliver her products. Okay, sure. But why do we have to climb a gigantic wall? Why do we have to run 75 kilometres?

Ugh, I can't think about this. Onto more interesting topics! Katelyn's death.

I need to figure out how she died. Despite what they tell us, it wasn't an overdose. I know it. Even though Katelyn herself told me she was gonna sneak extra pills, I don't think she really would have the guts to. Katelyn's not like that. Her funeral was today, but Maris wouldn't let us go.

"You have to stay and train"

I hate her.

My best friends funeral! And I have to train! I need to get out of this prison. I can't stay here. I won't.

Woah. I can't imagine doing that. Before Tobias was drafted, he took me to a fair in the next town over. There was a twenty foot tall climbing wall, I took almost 12 minutes to climb it, and by the end my arms were burning. Being able to climb 50 feet seems impossible. Fifty feet in one minute. That's nearly a foot per second! Impossible! I sit on the bed, feeling uncomfortable on unrecognized blankets. I don't recall anything about Maris's company. Why can't I remember?! Ok, I think. What do I know?

I know that I have 6 siblings.

I know that Tobias went to War and didn't come back.

I know that Willa hates me. Gia looks up to me. Okla and Mika couldn't care less about me — all they think about is their video games— and Ethan is two, so he doesn't really care either way.

I also know that at one point, I wrote a journal.

I know that in that journal there were secrets. Katelyn died. Pills. Running impossibly long distances in such short times.

But... there are gaps.

Why would I sign myself over to Maris?

How did I get here?

When did I get here?

How could I get out?