If I came back now would you still be there?
If I come around would you even care?
~~~
As soon as Niall walks into the bar, Zayn in tow, he's practically shitting himself with anxiety. He's trembling and can't keep his eyes straight, as they're constantly scanning the room around him for any sign of the one person he wants to see most.
It's taken far too long for Niall to realize it, but he knows he can't live without Harry. He knows just what Harry means to him now, and he knows that, despite what his family may think, he truly does deserve the love and happiness Harry brings to his life. He hasn't quite forgiven his family for what they did, but he knows he doesn't need their acceptance or love to be whole anymore.
He has finally learned that he is allowed to be happy.
"Ni, mate, you okay?" Zayn asks lowly, setting his hand on Niall's shoulder.
"Y-Yeah, I'm okay," he answers, nervously wringing his hands around the neck of his guitar case as he impatiently waits for his set to start.
"Do you need anything? A snack? A drink?" Zayn offers and Niall nods gratefully.
"Something to calm down a little bit," Niall says quietly, his eyes peeled for any sign of Harry he can see. He knows Liam and Louis will be bringing him out tonight, as he made sure Louis knew the plan, so he's anxiously awaiting for them to appear in the doorway.
Zayn comes back right quick with a shot of something, and Niall takes it, immediately downing it with not so much as a grimace at the bitter taste, "Whoa, Ni, you weren't kidding," Zayn muses, but Niall is still watching the doorway, "Come on, let's get you backstage."
Niall merely nods at Zayn's words, unable to find his own as he let's Zayn lead him to the backstage area and out of the way of everyone else in the bar. As Niall is chewing on his bottom lip, running the lyrics through his mind one more time, his eyes are still glued to the doorway, praying his person will step through it.
Finally, about three minutes before Niall goes on, Liam and Louis walk in with a slightly down Harry trailing behind them. Seeing the ghost of sadness on Harry's face makes Niall's heart clench as a frown makes its way to his own.
He knows he did that to the loveliest boy in the world, and that kills him. He knows he let his own problems get in the way of what was beautiful, and most likely would have stayed that way. But no, he had to let his own insecurities interfere and it cost him everything.
But he knows what he did. He forgot to love Harry the way he was supposed to. He was so focused on what his family had done that he forgot to love Harry how Harry deserved to be loved, and he will not make that mistake - never again.
He can see the apprehension in Harry's eyes as his two mates lead him over to a booth that is positioned on the far side of the room, in direct view of the stage. Niall can see the slight frown the taller lad is sporting, and the fact that his eyes keep flitting about, almost as if he's looking for someone.
Niall's heart flutters with a small flicker of hope at the thought that maybe, just maybe, Harry is looking for him, too. To stay hidden, Niall ducks his head back so he's no longer visible from the main floor.
"You're on in two, Niall," Dean says, coming up behind the boy, "You're ready for this. You have been practicing for weeks. You don't even need to sing more than one song, if you don't want. You can just sing this one and be done. But if you do that, don't be surprised when all of the regulars who have been complaining about your absence get upset when you try to stop.
