Isa dropped Iris off at home, he was feeling reluctant of letting her go. During the ride home he kept holding her hand, only letting go to shift gear. Iris found it adorable but asked: “Why do you keep holding my hand.” She didn’t want to jinx the moment, because everything was going so well, but it just slipped out.
“I don’t want you to slip away again”, Isa said softly.
Iris didn’t knew what to respond, she was hesitating whether to drop his hand or not. But she just didn’t want to upset him. She was caring and she only realized this on the drive back home. It also made her realize she already said too much.
They stopped in front of Iris’s apartment, Isa was uncertain of his next move but leaned in to give her a peck on the cheek. Iris saw him leaning in and staggered back at his sudden closeness. She bit her lip : “It was lovely tonight Isa.” Isa nodded but felt really hurt about her rejection.
He couldn’t believe she pulled back but perhaps behind every pathetic deed is a sad story we must understand. Isa stared at Iris entering the apartment and took off. He went to his roof, reminiscing the day. He smiled at the stars like they knew all his secrets. Isa had always been looking for that perfect girl.
But what is perfect? How would you describe it? Iris, he thought, she is my perfection. Isa had promised himself that when he would find the perfect one he would give her his world.
And now that he thought he found her, he’s struggling to find a way to give HER to herself. Isa wasn’t stupid, he saw how she closed him off again at the end of the night. But he’ll show her, he promised himself, what she’s worth to him.
Iris walked down to the lake, curling herself on the bench. She was conflicted, not knowing what to think of the situation. She was really doubting Isa’s motives. Was he doing this as a psychiatrist? To make her crack or was he actually feeling something. Iris was doubting if she could trust him.
After that day she worked at Hunch for 3 days straight, this got her mind off of things. It was getting busier in the diner, mainly because of the weather getting colder.
Isa was anticipating his session with Iris and had been contented by every patient passing so he could finally talk to her. Wednesday was finally there. Isa waited in his office, preparing himself for the storm.
I’ll take it, he thought, whatever IT is.
He immediately saw the change in her attitude as she walked in. Again. Isa took her in, she was wearing ripped black jeans and a shirt of the Ramones, black combat boots completing her outfit. He was wondering if she wasn’t cold while she sat down in silence. Isa stayed silent too, speculating her following reaction.
Iris wasn’t looking forward to today, seeing him in the office was making her uncomfortable but mostly mad. Mad that she fell into his trap by bearing her soul to him.
“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.” She stated.
Isa was certainly confused by that. “Why are you saying that?” “Like you don’t know.” She said accusingly. Isa looked at her bewildered:” What are you even talking about Iris.” He was definitely not expecting that.
“You confuse me, you’re trying to pull my strings like I’m a puppet. Just stop it Isa!” she literally screamed the last part while holding her head. He hated to see her like this. Especially when he knew he was the cause for all of it.
“You crave the deepest connections with others but you don’t trust to let anyone in. Why is that?” he said frustrated.
“I stopped talking about how I felt because I knew no one cared anyway.” Isa took a deep breath. “You,” he said,” are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world. And that, I believe, is why you’re in so much pain.” He didn’t know what to say to make her realize that HE wasn’t the bad guy. Iris’s mind was in a frenzy.
“My heart is fragile glass and you’re holding a hammer right now.” She said angrily, but he knew it wasn’t directed at him. A silence washed over them and he looked at her fondly. Iris felt his eyes on him and looked up.
“I fancy you Iris Hale, I really do.” He said softly.
Iris was speechless, not expecting his words at all. “Do you trust me?” he asked. Iris sighed. “You haven’t given me a reason not to but you certainly made me doubt about it these last days.” This made Isa’s heart clench, he hadn’t done anything to lose her trust.
“Don’t we all want to feel something, we all want to be someone to another.” Isa quoted while she stayed silent. She was a mystery for Isa, he didn’t know what to do. He felt powerless.
Iris loved mysteries so much that she became one for him.
“No. You want that but I don’t,” she lied. Iris was getting fed up with her feelings. She was going to end this, hurt him with lies so he would leave her alone. Isa groaned.
“Then what do you want from me?!” he shouted exasperatedly.
Iris didn’t reply, put that blank face back on and saw how all hope left his face.
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Song of the day: James Morrison - Better Man