The Silence Isn't So Bad.

The Goons

Dear Me,

Why are you, you?

Love, the mute. Also known as... YOU.

~

I was currently doubled over in pain. Why you ask? Tommy Clarke, that's why. I didn't blame him for hating me but that doesn't mean I have to enjoy the sometimes daily beatings.

At least three times a week I'll be walking down the hall when out of no where I'm yanked into someplace inconspicuous. Like the janitors closet, or the boys bathroom during class, or the by the dumpster at the back of the school. There I'm beaten 'till I can't speak. Thats how much pain I'm put through. It's either because I'm wheezing really bad from blows to my stomach or because I've screamed so hard I've gone hoarse. I guess thats the part they like best. Hearing my screams. Probably because they know I despise making noises. So they not only hurt me physically, but now it's been taken to an emotional level. As if I'm not screwed up enough.

Sometimes instead of coming at me in the small portion of safety the school offers I get jumped outside of school. Occasionally I'll be walking with Ronnie or by myself in a place like the mall or the movies, then I'll see one of the guys. Usually its Tommy or Jeff with several others but sometimes there will be someone different. They all want to join in the fun. Today is one of those times. It takes a couple guys to grab Ronnie and only one to get me. Believe it or not Ronnie is quite small so he can't really defend himself.

I just saw a swarm of guys huddle around him then I'm flung over someones shoulder and carried off into a deserted hallway. You see, I prefer getting beaten alone at school rather than here where Ronnie has a slight chance of protecting me. Theres one simple reason, while at school a teacher could see the bullying and stop them. But here? No way, there was about a 10% chance that someone would see us and you know what they would do? They would walk away as if they hadn't seen anything. And that always sucked.

But the main reason I hate being found outside of school with Ronnie is they force Ronnie to watch. To see me crumble to the ground each time and to lay there sobbing, while he could do nothing to help me. In fact, it was about to happen now.

Ronnie thrashed while the positioned him a couple feet away from me, but he knew it was no use. Tonight I would leave severely battered whether he fought back or not. Tears filled his eyes when they made the first hit.

My stomach seemed to be rammed into my ribcage when their fist collided with my skin. Before I could even react to the blow I was on the ground. My face stung and burned from the strength in the slap. My vision went fuzzy as my eyes un-focused. Tears over flowed my eyes not helping my sight one bit. One of the guys roughly grabbed my arm and yanked me into standing position. Everything became clear again as I reacted in surprise. I looked down to make sure I wasn't hallucinating from to many blows to my head. No, I was correct.

Tommy grabbed my chest, harshly groping me before kicking my legs out from under me. Time seemed to go in slow motion while I fell. For a moment I was flying, it was bliss. But then I made impact. My head hit the floor first then the rest of my body followed suit. I stared up at the boys. For once I was actually scared shitless. I glanced back at Ronnie who's mouth was a gape in shock. He clenched his jaw while his faced turned red. Shocked myself at his reaction I looked back up at my bullies. They towered over me, all of them confused except for Tommy.

He must have read the fright and confusion in my eyes. I couldn't imagine what he was going to do to me. The bullying was bad enough, now this? He laughed at my expression before shrugging.

"Dude! What are you doing?!" One of the guys yelled at him. Suddenly I wasn't as afraid. At least one of the guys was going to stand up for me.

"Shut up!" He snarled looking over his shoulder. My hope vanished as the guys all quieted. Then Tommy turned back to me and winked.

I literally gagged. I tried to hold it in but I knew it was no use. I rolled to my side and lost 5 pounds of my body weight. The combination of kicks to my stomach and the sickly "sweet charm" of Tommy was incredible. While the boys were distracted Ronnie tried to escape their grasps and rescue me. Sadly, they weren't that distracted. Five-seconds later Ronnie was stuck in a tight head lock even farther away from me than normal.

As Tommy approached me I saw another goon coming towards us. Though he didn't have the same stupid look as the others I didn't doubt he was here to help corrupt me.

"They're bringing more eh? Good they'll need 'em." I thought darkly. I know I'm just a short, scrawny girl going up against 4 now 5 guys but there's no way in hell they're taking this from me without a fight.

Just as Tommy leaned over to jerk me up, I kicked. And just "happened" to hit him where the sun don't shine. He just about keeled over and landed next to me on the cold floor. Not hesitating a second I began crawling away from the mob of boys. But then I noticed the new guy was even closer to us than before. Before I could panic about him two arms circled my waist and wrenched me up. I let out one of my loudest screams hoping to either burst the boys eardrums or for someone to hear me. Both of which were a long short.

I knew that after kicking Tommy I wouldn't get away. I knew that they would rape me or come close to it. And I would be threatened to stay silent, ironically enough.

Strangely enough while I was being pulled off the ground everything slowed down again. This time I saw the new thug running towards us. His slow-mo voice was hilarious as he yelled for them to... stop? Maybe I really was mental in some way now. After all, I was alternating slow motion, and I could have sworn I heard that guy shouting at them to stop.

But before I could process anything else I was struck in the head. Again. My eyes quickly grew tired from the mind-numbing pain. The guy was meters away now. But once again I couldn't process. It was very much like the other times this night except once more I wasn't being lifted but I was falling. And right before I hit the hard, cold ground I managed to focus on the boys face. And he was beautiful. I heard footsteps fading away as I closed my eyes. I was just so tired.