survivor of the Sun

The Lust

He could see his room clearly. The wall opposite to him. The bed below him. The ceiling above him. The cupboards to his left and table to his left. Window behind him. Everything was good. Everything was white. He tried to sleep again. Waited for a long time on the bed and gave up. He walked towards the door and unlocked it. He pulled it. He pulled it again. He pulled it again. This time he crouched and peeped into the keyhole, he couldn’t see anything. He pulled the door again crouching on the ground and held it as long as his face went red and fell on his back. His whole body was aching and his breathe was heavy but the door stood tall and it seemed like it laughed it’s mouth out. He was bewildered and sweating heavy. He got up and walked towards the phone, tried to switch it on and it powered up. The battery was 100% but there was no network. He restarted it but found no upgrade. He paced towards the cupboards, maybe to find the key, he searched everything. There was a pile of books and yet none would open when he tried. The drawers slid but there were only empty white papers. There was no key. There were switches which won’t work. The room was lit extraordinarily and everything was plain white. Only distinguishable mechanisms in the room were the windows with doors that can be slid up and down. He skedaddled to the window and before he could try to open it, he started hearing voices. The window won’t open. The view outside was dark and a little breeze escaped itself into the room. He reached to the bed. The voices did not stop. ‘Hi,’ said a high pitched sweet voice. ‘Thambi,’ said other low pitch voice. ‘Seesh…Guru…Thambi…hello…vettai…bro..’ giggles, roars, horns, cracks, screeches, child cry, heavy breathing. Every sound was hitting his head like a hammer and everything was shouting at a time. He could not take it. He held the pillow to his head and screamed. His eyes went red. His body started acting on its own; His legs moved from his crotch to bottom of the bed simultaneously, muscles were dancing like a wave. He got out of the bed at once and started moving around, hitting the wall, the table, and the cupboards. Books and papers fell to the ground, the table moved around, the bed sheet all clumsy and it was a thunderstorm outside. He fell on the ground after a huge struggle with the voices and fell asleep in his unconsciousness. In his sleep he was falling into a no bottom dark abyss. He was falling falling falling for all the time, don’t know how long, and his body had no resistance at all. It was as if he jumped into the abyss. His eyes never blinked and he never shaped out of his curve. He was hitting into something. Something touched him and he went into it. Everything as damp and he couldn’t breathe inside the water. He swam towards the top and let in a huge breathe and opened his eyes on the bed. His breathe was heavy and he checked if anything was wet. Nothing was. He looked around and found everything in order. He was on the bed like he slept on the bed and tables, papers, books, cupboards; everything went to their normal position like someone pressed a reset button.

He was perplexed with all the events but he was not tired, rather he felt like someone had given him some energy drink. He closed him eyes. He tried to make a sense out of what had happened. The trip. The train. The people he met. The eyes that glared him on the train. He started smiling. Everything pleasant was clouding his senses. He breathed in and put in rhythms. He felt at ease. It was giving him some clear view cleaning away the dirt of fear and anxiety. Nasty toxics those two. He was clear and opened his eyes. Everything was still the same; there was not a single moment in the room that could yell I have changed. He was unmoved and walked towards the window and tried to open it. It did not. He looked out the window, it was pleasant and green. It seemed like the first day of Spring outside. Is it spring really? Outside the room everything visible was lush green grass as long as a naked eye can see and only one huge tree was standing in the center with all its might. It was brave and strong even in solidarity unlike the man inside the room. Or maybe it had never seen or experienced something outside of its cognitive zone. It was cheery tree, all leaves and a single fruit appearing. It might have been very happy that no one was there to eat its child. If someone had eaten it, would it spare him? Even the tree didn’t have an answer for that; how could it know until something of that sort had happened. Looking at the view the man felt a gist of relieve. That is what nature does to you, takes you to a land unknown yet pleasant and peaceful even in events of grave horrors, isn’t it? It is good, the nature.