hatred // malec

fuck me

this was it.
the last day of hanging out with magnus.
alec wasn't sure if he was sad or glad. he'd discovered that magnus was a really genuine and good guy.
he just wasn't sure where his feelings stood. he wanted to hang out with him more, but at the same time he didn't want to give in to such a long 'war' so easily.

alec felt conflicted, to say the least. however, his mood automatically brightened when max burst through his bedroom door, isabelle and jace in tow.

he would die for the three of them. they were his world.
"alec, you're smart. tell max that he can't have marshmallows as cereal and fresh cream as milk for breakfast," jace said, sounding extremely exasperated.
"alec, you're kind. tell max that he can have marshmallows as cereal and fresh cream as milk for breakfast," isabelle copied, squeezing her littlest brother's cheeks.
"i'm with jace on this one. if you really want that, maxie, wait till after dinner."
max pouted. "no! don't wanna! waiting too long!"
isabelle faked a disgusted gasp. "how DARE you deny him? he's adorable! max, i allow you-"
alec coughed. "ahem, who's the oldest?"
isabelle rolled her eyes and jumped up and down like a toddler having a tantrum. "you're no fun!"
jace laughed. "aHA! i was right once more," he said, holding his head proudly and high-fiving alec.
"jace, take max and give him breakfast. alec, i am giving you a lecture," izzy said, immediately striking fear into alec. isabelle's lectures never ended well.

jace mouthed 'i'm sorry' at him as he left with max. isabelle's dark eyes were glowing with mischief.
"right. so. it's the last day you have to hang out with magnus for, right?" she said, calmly and confidently.
alec felt like he knew where this was going, but he wanted to give his baby sister a chance.
he loved calling her a baby.
she did not.
"yes?"
"well, i just want to give you some advice."
alec rolled his eyes. forget giving her a chance. "i know where you're going with this. blah blah you might get caught at school blah blah don't be loud blah blah use protection. we're not going to fuck."
izzy laughed. in fact, she was laughing so hard she was doubled over and tears were in her eyes.
"alec, oh my god. that is, for once, not at all what i was going to say."
alec's face reddened.
"i was going to say i think you two have something. don't interrupt me -i know what i mean. magnus isn't this great big ball of shining light and happiness he pretends to be. well, i mean, he is in parts, but what lies behind is miles and miles of deep pain. i don't know much, but i know it takes him a long time to trust people. just, don't drop him like a piece of litter. at least, if you really don't want to hang out with him anymore, let him know why. mkay?" izzy said, finishing her speech.
alec closed his eyes and drew in a breath. "okay. i don't know what i want yet. i know he's a good person, though."
she smiled, and squeezed alec's hand. "

"that's all you need to know."

*********

magnus walked into the classroom and took his seat beside alec. he had actually really enjoyed their week together, and was sort of planning to ask alec if he wanted to hang out at the weekend. he wasn't sure how he felt though; would he want this too? he had been nice, albeit not very open. but he felt that if given the chance he and alec could have a wonderful friendship.

"hey!"
alec turned round to meet magnus's eyes. he smiled, and it made magnus's heart happy. to know he was happy, of course.
not because he totally one hundred percent found him extremely attractive and might possibly have the teeniest crush on him.

oh, he wasn't fooling anyone. magnus was soooo gone. but he didn't want to get his hopes up. he was still figuring it out, what this 'crush' meant to him. after so many years of fighting, it was going to be hard for their relationship dynamic to change.

"magnus? you okay?" alec said, bringing him back to reality with a blush.
"i- yes, i'm fine. what is it?"
"i was trying to talk to you for the past ten minutes."
"oh. sorry. ha," magnus muttered, embarrassed.
alec raised his eyebrows and chuckled. "i'm only joking. hey, so, last day of this, huh?"
"oh! yes. can't wait for the weekend!" magnus said.
"bet you're sick of me by now," alec replied, with a tone that to magnus sounded a little flirtatious, but then again it was him so uh, no, it would never happen.
"well, i'm starting to like you," he said.
alec laughed a little, then turned around to his friends.

magnus couldn't help feeling a little disheartened that their conversation wasn't longer, but he had after school to make it work. which reminded him; he needed to ask alec to stay behind for a few minutes.

he had spoken with isabelle the night before, and he'd opened up a little. he'd told her he actually genuinely liked alec, and he wanted to become proper friends with him. in turn, she explained why alec was the way he was -in short. that their dad was always awful to him, that he struggled with a few issues (she didn't explain what she meant but judging by the fact she said issues she wasn't going to), and that he just really needed someone who was there for him.
"i mean he knows tonnes of people. he's got a group of close friends. but they're not like, close close. and i think that's what he needs; someone who he can trust fully, who he can actually be close with. like jace and i."

izzy's words floated around in magnus's mind. he blushed as he remembered what he said.
as there were only fifteen minutes left before class actually started, magnus figured he could do more of the drawing he'd been doing all week. it was almost done; and he actually had intentions to show it to alec.

he barely even heard the bell ring, but as he slipped his sketch pad back into his bag, he noticed out of the corner of his eye that alec had been watching him draw.
or had, at least, seen the drawing. neither of them acknowledged it.

*******

as the final bell rang, magnus couldn't help but feel his nerves getting the better of him. this was so stupid. maybe he should just forget it and go home, forced to regret his decision all weekend.
then again, he didn't really have anything to lose.

alec came over to where he was standing of his own accord. he smiled, but didn't say anything. magnus figured this was going to be his only opportunity.
"hey alec?"
"yeah?"
"do you wanna hang out at the weekend?"
alec raised his eyebrows. "what?"
"well i thought that the time we had together was great, but there wasn't much. so, do you wanna hang out to get to know each other a bit better?"

alec waited until the last students left, then turned to face magnus properly.
"you're having a laugh, right? you don't actually think we're friends now?"
magnus's face fell. "i -i just wanted to hang out, that's all. i didn't say we were friends."
alec rolled his eyes. "no can do, sorry. i have a life."

magnus felt angry. why was alec being so rude?
"you've been nice all week. i've been honest all week. why now, are you acting like a stuck-up entitled asshole?!" his voice was raising.

alec narrowed his eyes. "you must be incredibly stupid. could you not honestly tell how fake i was acting?"
"well it didn't fucking look fake when you blushed at nearly any given moment!"

alec's eyes widened. he felt blood rush to his face. he stood there, his mind telling him to deny it, that there was no blushing, that it was true and everything was fake.
"i'm sorry," magnus whispered.
alec turned away, running his fingers through his hair and magnus thought for a moment if he had went too far.

he came back around, and slammed magnus -albeit not hard enough to hurt him- against the lockers. the two of them stood, making intense eye contact.

and then it happened.

alec's mouth was on magnus's in a split second. magnus wasn't sure what was going on, but he kissed back. he felt hands trail down his sides, making him shiver, until alec found a hold; one hand on the lower of his back, one tangled in magnus's hair. magnus raised his hands to cup alec's face. he pushed forward, and flipped them around so that now alec was against the lockers.
he broke the kiss to move his lips to alec's neck, feeling alec shiver and gasp at the feeling. then he broke away, looking at alec's beautiful, astonished face.

alec pushed magnus off him and searched for something in his bag. without saying anything, he wrote something on a piece of paper and handed it to magnus.

"do not tell anyone this happened," he said, and left. magnus looked at the paper.

it was alec's number.