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You shifted uneasily at the thought of letting yourself go to Tom. You barely knew him, and were honestly unsure whether or not you could trust him with your secrets. Your past life was precious, whether it gave you scars or memories, it still meant a lot to you and you weren't just about to hand feed it to someone you barely knew. But then again, you weren't saying that at the opportunity to have sex with him... You twiddled your thumbs together, Tom moving his hands to cup your waist, rubbing his thumbs against your skin gently. You buttoned up the top part of the shirt before taking a deep breath.
"Y/N, please" he whispered, tilting your head down slightly with his finger so your eyes could meet. "Tom can't it wait?" you asked, blinking frantically. You didn't want to have to tell Tom yet, you knew you would in your own time. When you could trust him enough.
"No, not really" Tom said bluntly, still crouched at the lining of your stomach. You turned your head to the side, sighing harshly. "Please, i'll tell you when i'm ready" you said, biting the inside of you cheek. It was one thing caring and another understanding. You can love someone enough to hear their problems, but it's another thing trying to get your head around something you haven't lived through, and trying to fit into someone else's shoes when their life is so different to yours.
Tom sighed, giving in and understanding you needed some time. He slid his arm around your back, and another under your legs, picking you up bride style and bringing you slowly towards his chest. You smiled softly before Tom slowly made his way up the stairs, your legs shaking up every step. Soon he brought you to one of the spare bedrooms, understanding you still wanted to make a decision. He placed you down softly, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear and placing a loose kiss on your soft cheek.
"I know today has been a little rushed, and things are moving pretty quickly. But, I really hope you can settle down here, because I really like you" he smiled, hair falling over his eyes. Despite what you said earlier, your past had surely cursed you. You were unable to give Tom the full benefit of the doubt and the satisfaction of having your trust. "Thank you" you smiled, tracing your hands down his bare arms before taking a step backwards. You wandered over to your draw to get changed, and when you turned back around Tom was gone. You took a deep breath, closing your eyes as you breathed out slowly.
After changing, you tied your hair up into a messy bun and got into bed, the mattress feeling weirdly comfortable. The bed you were used to was more like sleeping on a lake of concrete and squeaky springs than a block that felt more like you were on cloud nine. The quilt was heavy, but soft and moulded to your figure as your head sank down in the feather pillow.
Somewhat in the darkness you found yourself wide awake, staring at your bedroom wall. The small candles waiting to be lit which you had brought earlier that morning staring back at you. But the thought that Tom was meters away was also stuck in your mind and kept you awake for most of the night. Remembering before he found the scars, the way he pleasured you. The burning sensation be made you feel between your legs as he pounded into you like a wild animal. And then the softer, more caring side. Despite being sexually attractive, there was the side of Tom that was delicate and more soft. It made your heart flutter when he caressed you gently, even with small touches he made you feel safe and secure. He sure was a keeper.
