· Pheobe Pov ·
16 years its been and i havent talked to anyone or barely smile or laugh since that day in the clearing. mom and dad are still worried about me not speaking but the whole family and my two bestfriends learnt sign language to communicate with me so its alright
your probably wondering why i stopped talking right? well that day on the field i felt a pull to one of the guards but i havent seen him since that day. he promised to come back but he didnt keep promise cause he never did come back.
everyday since that day i waited by the windows for him i didnt realize how unhealthy or bad it was until dad spoke to me one day trying to get me to talk he seems more scared about me not being able to talk than the others well except aunt alice and mom..its like the three of them know something and arent telling me about it but whatever
your probably wondering if i have a gift like the others and the answer is yes i have three gifts actually im a sheild like my mom abd can send my thoughts like renesmee but i can read mines too like my dad its pretty cool but can still be really annoying sometimes specially when uncle emmett is thinking about aunt rose its just disturbing..
unlike renesmee and the others im homeschooled so i dont really have any friends other than seth clearwater and suprisingly paul lahote. hes like a big brother who will always stick up for me when people bully me about the mute thing and seth is my other bestfriend. me and paul know absolutly everything about eachother hes the only person i show my thoughts to since hes the only person i completely trust to not judge or think that im being silly or depressing.
its not that my family think that but over time you start to think thats what they are thinking and i dont like listening to their thoughts its private but to be honest it feels like they are all slowly forgetting about me and i feel kinda left out i told paul about it and he said i could move in with him if i wanted too he already asked sam for permission but i want to leave altogether i want to have an adventure
i remember when i used to be daddys little girl i miss those days but its my fault they dont happen anymore. i feel so lost since the day at the clearing, it feels like i lost all my happiness and joy
the only time i smile or laugh now is when im with paul or seth. my family try to make me smile but everytime i look at them it makes me feel that emptiness in my heart they all have mates even my sister has one but i feel like the odd one out.. i just want to leave
"phoebe come down here" dad called
i sighed putting on my hunting boots and grabbed parka jacket and raced downstairs to be met with my parents
"angel were all going out hunting if you wanna join us?" mom asked smiling
my face slightly grimaced at the thought of spending time with my family wyeb there all with their significant other but i quickly changed it to a small smile
'no thankyou' i signed to them
i think dad saw the grimace cause he frowned and looked really sad
"cmon pheobe when was the last time you went hunting" he tried to encourage me with a small smile
i sighed he doesnt undetstand
'paul took me yesterday' i signed
dad sighed nodding his head and left with a weak smile and mom trailing behind him it made me feel bad but whenever im with my family i feel even more lonely and it hurts so i try to spend all the time in my room or with paul
i sighed and went and sat down by the piano and slowly started to play a tune
the only time i ever play the piano is when they are all out of the house because each time i play i let my emotions out into the music and the only emotions i ever feel are negative
lonely
empty
jealous
sad
naive
pressured
forgotten
and i dont want my family knowing how i really feel sure jasper knows but thats his gift and he respects my privacy to much which is why i love him hes like a brother to me and protects my privacy sounds strange i know but dad and alice are always asking him how im feeling when they think im not around
i love the feelin of getting lost in my music onlu paul has ever heard me sing and grandma but that was by accident and i made her promise not to tell anyone cause i would feel violated thankfully she agreed but she didnt look happy about it
I stared up at the sun
Thought of all of the people, places and things I've loved
I stared up just to see
Of all the faces, you were the one next to me
You can feel the light start to tremble
washing what you know out to sea
You can see your life out of the window, tonight
If I lose myself tonight
It'll be by your side
If I lose myself tonight
If I lose myself tonight
It'll be you and I
If I lose myself tonight
I woke up with the sun
Thought of all the people, places and things I've loved
And I woke up just to see
with all the faces, you were the one next to me
You can feel the light start to tremble
washing what you know out to sea
You can see your life out of the window, tonight
If I lose myself tonight
It'll be by your side
If I lose myself tonight
Whoooooooooo
If I lose myself tonight
It'll be you and I
If I lose myself tonight
Whoooooooooo
If I lose myself tonight
If I lose myself tonight
If I lose myself tonight
i let out a sigh as i finished the song wiping all the tears away that started to fall down my cheeks but they just kept cascading down more and more
i am alone
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thats th first chapter of the sequal hope you enjoyed it folks!!
LEAVE A COMMENT!!! :) ♥
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