1950

3.

London looked like a circus.

When I stepped out of the train, my little bag at my feet, the smile on my face was uncertain. The aire was thick, the tall buildings seemed to hide the sky and people seemed to be running for their lives as if 24 hours weren't enough ti complete all of their tasks. A shiver crawled up my back. Anticipation and fear were the words of honour that day.

My eyes, used to the greenery of countryside, were blinded by all the grey surrounding me.. The ladies' dresses looked odd, so gracious and colourful, in this world of darkness. I had also never seen so many cars: I had to watch my every step to make sure none ran me over, while, back home, we would barely see one a week.

I forced my feet to move forward and tried to keep my head low, scared to meet the eyes of these fancy city people. We, countrymen, always felt intimidated by those citizens from such big cities who often made a stop by our town. They looked at us from above, even when they were smaller. Nobody grew a wider hatred towards them than my mother. She could stay inside for hours, neglecting courses and her usual hobbies, to make sure she wouldn't meet one of these gentlemen in the street.

"-Watch where you're going!"screamed a man while pushing me aside as I was about to run into him, lost in my thoughts.

"-You look where you go!"I screamed back, immediately wishing I had not.

"-What did you say?"he turned back towards me to ask.

He was a tall man with broad shoulders and his blue uniform confirmed me that he was a marine.

"-Nothing, I said have a good day", I mumbled.

"-You country folks have never learned good manners. I'll teach you a quick lesson."

He grabbed my bag, put it down and used my empty hands to put them on my chest, right at the heart.

"-You, milady, are a woman. You stay home, cook and, most importantly, keep your mouth shut. I don't know what they teach you in countryside, but that's how it works here, in the real world."

Humiliation painted my cheeks red and I tried my best not to collapse in tears.

"-But, you are indeed pretty, with curves just where they should be, so I'll forgive you. Now, take your bag again and follow me, I'll bring you to a wonderful expensive restaurant where you can get to know me while I admire the view -you.

-I am fine, thank you. I've got to go, I am awaited somewhere. I'm sure some other lovely gal will love to hear all about you."

I've always despised men. They were so full of themselves and I learned a long time ago that, whatever they had to say was rarely interesting. Mother always wanted me to come home with a pretty man and bound the ties, but I could never find one that would make me feel anything else than disgust. I had mo problem whatsoever ending up alone if it meant not having to live with a man as annoyingly selfish as the one I had just met.

We both quickly walked away, as if this interaction had never taken place, the only sign were my trembling hands, which shaking could've been mistaken for the cold weather. My breath created a little cloud towards the level of my mouth every time I opened it to exhale.

After a few stops to ask for indications and to put down my heavy bag to rest my arms, I was finally at my destination. I looked up towards the presbytery turned into a medical facility during this time of war and walked up the numerous stairs to get to the door. As I knocked, I could hear an evangelical singing from inside.

A little blond girl, who looked so pale she matched with the white walls, opened the talk wooden door with a wide smile.

"-Hi and welcome to Lottusis House!"she squeaked while grabbing ahold of my arm.

We entered the hall, which was about the size of our kitchen, the biggest room in our house, and she leaded me towards the end of the hallway.

"-This is your room. Oh, there is a new arrival, I got to got and welcome them! You'll love it here, we'll make sure you do. Get yourself comfortable, dinner will be served at six."

And just like that, I was alone in my new home for the next few weeks.