Jay didn't come from a place filled with happily ever afters. He was a black kid growing up in Harlem. Like most boys in his neighborhood Jay was drawn into the gangster life. The money and bitches just appealed to him.
But, when he gets into some...
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Losing a parent was hell. Losing one that was actually a constant presence in your life was worse. When I first lost my dad, that shit rocked me to my damn core. Sure life in my neighborhood wasn't a sure thing. You had to fight for each breath you took but, he was different.
Everyone respected him, his hustle, how he took care of us and how much he loved my mom. I never remember a day where I saw that man stressed or sweating anyone. It was like he had peace of mind with life. I used to catch a lot of hate at school. They were jealous because I had both my parents. One wasn't strung out or locked up. That knock on the door changed everything.
"Jay, you okay?" Leo asked from where he was straddling my lap. We were about to do the damn thing when I let my thoughts get the best of me.
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"I'm good" I mumbled.
"You sure?" he sighed.
"Yeah. Now come here" I said pulling him forward.
He sucked on my lips while I gripped his ass. I tried to shut down my thoughts and focus. This was a day I fucking hated and the only way I got through it was with sex and weed. Fuck a bitch and smoke a blunt was the go to.
"Shit!" I cursed pulling away.
"Okay what?" he spoke confused getting up and sitting beside me.
"I can't do this to you" I groaned.
"Do what?" Leo asked.
"You're not like the women I usually fuck with. I can't just fuck you and then leave, which is what I would usually do on the anniversary of my dad's death. I can't use you like that" I muttered running a hand down my bare stomach.
"I don't care" he hummed.
"You say that but, you do" I countered.
"How do you know?" he questioned.
"Because-" I began but, decided to keep my damn mouth shut. Saying that shit, what I was thinking, it wasn't a good idea. We weren't ready for that. I wasn't ready to say it and he sure as hell wasn't prepared to listen.
"Your father is dead and mine is downstairs at the moment. We both have daddy issues and this may not help but, I don't care. Stop thinking and do" he told me before getting up. I was staring at the ceiling so, I didn't notice him kneel in front of me. I did, however, feel my pants become unzipped.
Never one to shut down some bomb ass head, I cleared my mind and focused on him. Sitting up, I licked my lips and pulled his hair back giving him all access. The way this boy sucked my dick was like a good ass blunt on a Saturday. Heaven.
"Fuck! Come here" I snapped pulling him up.
He looked at me for a moment, not saying anything. Removing the rest of our clothes, I laid him out on the bed. Slowly, I planted kisses up his chest until I reached his neck where I decided to leave a mark.
"Jay" he gasped. I silenced him with my mouth.
"It's been a while, you sure?" I questioned.
"Stop, and just fuck me please" he scoffed.
"Ain't got to ask me twice, shit" I responded. I found a condom and began to enter him. The entire time he bit his lip trying to keep quiet. When I was all the way in he wrapped his legs around my waist as I began to move. He couldn't keep quiet then.
"Oh damn!! Harder!!" he groaned. I smiled because I knew for a fact they would be able to hear us downstairs, also his ass felt so good.
"Shit baby" I muttered sitting up so now not only was I moving easier but, deeper inside of him.
Leo became a mess as his back arched in pleasure. Wrapping a hand around his neck, I pulled him up into a kiss. He moaned as I continued to dig him out while devouring his mouth. I knew he was getting close. Pulling out, I had him turn over onto his hands and knees. Minutes later he nutted while screaming into the sheets.
"I care" I sighed as we laid beside each other trying to catch our breath.
"Huh?" he hummed confused.
"I would care if I used you, that's how I know you would" I murmured.
"Well did you?" he asked turning to look at me.
I watched him, trying to feel him out. See what was going through his damn head because I had no clue what was going through my mind. This wasn't one of those cheesy as 80's movies where the two white people confess their love in the rain and they trick your ass into believing they lived happily ever after. Everyone knows they asses were laid up in bed the next day sick as fuck, wishing they did that shit inside.
In the real world, you didn't get happily ever after. You got dead fathers and policemen trying to gun you down just for the color of your skin. Friends getting hooked on drugs and heroin needles on playgrounds. Shit wasn't a movie but, survival and being down here, around him, I was beginning to forget that. I couldn't because eventually, I would be going home, and this place wasn't it.
"We should shower" I sighed getting up.
"I guess" he mumbled following me. I stopped him in the doorway of the bathroom.
"I didn't" I whispered.
"Liar. It's okay. I used you too so, we good" he chuckled before stepping into the shower. He turned on the water as I got in behind him.
"You enjoyed yourself though" I muttered smirking as I caught glimpse of the mark on his neck.
"The dick is good" he confessed turning around to face me. I ran my hand through his wet hair.
"Baby I know" I spoke.
"Asshole" he scoffed.
"I know that too"I stated and he just smiled.
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Update as promised. This was kind of a chapter to go deeper into Jaysean's thoughts and the inner battle he is dealing with. What do you think? Next Leo's mom comes home and all hell breaks loose. Also, Leslie gets a little more mess and Jay is just himself, while Leo is caught in the middle.
