The air was so thick with tension I could hardly breathe. I knew Cailler was sort of expecting an answer, though I'd probably provided it already, but I didn't want to hurt him even more, nor fight to say it myself, what we all knew was the truth.
1) I should've loved him, but I couldn't.
2) I loved the Lord of the Vampires.
Everything was wrong about that... Why couldn't my heart do the right thing?
I looked up at my love, my Xavier, tears finally bursting free to run down my face, and he kneeled to take me into his arms. I hated how this would look to Cailler, hurting him so, but I just so desperately needed Xavier's comfort...
~*~
I knew her decision wouldn't change even after my confession, but it still hurt, a physically torturous pain in my chest, as if someone had driven my own stake-which lay at my feet not too far away, but I couldn't bring myself to pick it up to kill the vampire who'd taken her away from me-into my body and twisted it around in an effort to create a figure-eight pattern. I almost fell to my knees again at the effort, joining them on the floor, but I struggled to stay on my feet, forcing them toward the window again.
I slipped away from everything my heart had ever devoted itself too, hanging onto the roof in preparation to swing up, contemplating letting go and committing suicide. It would've been dramatic enough, with the cliché of a full moon glowing in the sky. I almost wished for a crescent, or at least a half, to represent the breaking of my heart.
No. That was stupid. I had a new purpose now-to erase the pain in my heart, to seize Alexis from that vampire, to have her fall in love with me.
I swayed my legs back in forth to create momentum, then, at the highest point to one side, I let go, sailing cleanly through the hair to land on the rooftop of the building, crouching like a cat to absorb the shock into my legs.
If only love were so easy.
~*~
"I love you," I sighed, letting him press his mouth to mine once more as I snuggled closer to his comfortable chest.
Xavier smiled faintly, fondly at me. "I love you more," he told me, kissing the underside of my chin, then my earlobe, and finally my temple. "Now sleep. Don't worry about anything, I'm here."
I had complete faith in him...yet how could I not? I'd broken my childhood friend's heart, but also, the other heir of the slayers. Would he report back to the slayers and tell them of my betrayal? Was I completely ruined? I fisted my fingers around the soft fabric of his shirt, feeling more tears prick my eyes.
He made a low sound of concern, his fingers darting forward to wipe them all away. "It's okay, Alexis, I promise," he crooned, his voice carrying an edge of desperation that made the comforting words useless.
"No, it isn't," I sobbed. "I don't know what to do. I don't know what is right. I don't know what I should do to make things the way I want them."
He nuzzled against my temple, his body agitated with distress. "Don't worry, baby, it'll all work out!"
I denied it automatically. "No, it won't. There's nothing I can do to put everything right! No matter what I do, someone will hate me."
"I'd never hate you," he vowed.
"Even if I married Cailler and unified the slayers?" I asked hysterically. His silence, his tense body, was enough of an answer than anything else he could've said, and the tears surged even more intensely now. "I'm so sorry, I'm so, so sorry!" I wailed, and cried into his chest.
He let me cry myself out, completely disregarding how I was probably ruining his shirt with tears, occasionally murmuring a word of consolation but knowing this was necessary, that I had to get the emotions broiling around my heart from Cailler's arrival. When the torrent finally slowed and eventually ceased, I sniffled once and curled into his side, feeling unbearably vulnerable. My cheek withdrew from the fabric of his shirt, the dampness causing it to stick.
"Are you all right?" he asked cautiously, gently pulling me up into a sitting position.
I leaned against him, my eyes swollen uncomfortably. I pressed my palms against them as I propped my elbows against my knees, my breath breaking and halting oddly as I struggled to regain calm.
He pressed his lips to my temple. "If Cailler made you happy," he said softly, "I would let you go. If he really and truly made you happy."
"No," I whispered, still trembling. "He could never. It's only you. It will only be you forever."
~*~
I almost reacted when she said the word forever. Did that mean I had a hope of changing her, that she would become my Queen and rule the vampires with me? It wouldn't be too different, the power; she was already used to being a Princess. She was going to be a Queen eventually. At twenty, slayer heirs became rulers. She was just years away.
But I feared ruling over vampires-the hated enemies of her people, the slayers-would be too much for her. How could we change this? How could everything turn out right? There was no answer for the plaintive questions racing through my mind.
I turned my gaze to the girl in my arms, noting with pleasure that her breathing and heartbeat had now slowed. Each tear that ran down her cheeks, no matter how much I attempted to wipe them all away, caused a stab of pain to resonate through my heart, and I wanted to strangle that horrible slayer, Cailler, for making her cry so hard. I realized that the wetness was uncomfortable, for both of us, and acted without thinking, moving with my usual impulse, things I had gotten used to before Alexis had come to live in my penthouse. I took off my shirt, glad to get rid of the awkward sensation of wet clothing clinging to my body.
She uttered a choked gasp of shock, and I realized what I'd done.
Oops.
~*~
He just took off his shirt!
I fought to pull my gaze away from his amazing muscles, chiseled so perfectly it was redolent of statues of Greek gods, but my eyes didn't seem to want to obey, tracing the line of his pectorals before moving down to examine his abs and the plunging "v" that dipped past the waistband of his pants. I shivered, warmth spreading over my whole body. In terms of distractions, he was magnificent. My nerves were humming with awareness, electrifying my blood.
He reached out, his fingers taking my chin gently-so different from Cailler!-to tilt my face upward so our eyes met. "You...want me. Don't you?" he whispered in a low, husky voice that sent my heart shivering.
---
so like im a naughty girl LOL
dont worry, i cant write smex |DDDD
YOU ARE READING
Slayer [vampire+vampire hunter]
RomanceWhen Alexis Pranton, princess and heir of the strongest vampire slayer line of all time, pursues the Lord of the Vampires, a mysterious male named Xavier, with the intent to kill him, he offers her an irresistible deal. She gives into him and begins...