Stupid Dhroov

It all begins today

I called Natasha and told her how things were not working out between us.
She did not take it so well.

I remember the exact conversation i had with her that night.
She was staying at her grandma's place for summer vacation. She described it as the most beautiful place on earth she has ever been to. But then she has not been to so many places.

That night all she said was 'Dhrovansh i dont ever want to see you. Dont try to text me or contact me through any way. Fuck you.'

I did not have any words to make it better.

I have never been good while ending stuff. Even when i fight with someone i just dont know how to win. Sometimes i wish things never ended with anyone or for anyone for any reason possible, it just stays the way it is, may be gets better with time.

I saw this movie the dogs purpose. The narrator says a line, ' I dont understand humans. They just leave.'
This statement is so apt. Infact i had tears while seeing that movie. Yeah yeah i am a dog person but i am definitely not the guy who cries after seeing movies ( most of the times).

Now i had my friends to help me out with my break up. Apparently one of my friend kind of forced me into it because she knew that i was not into Natasha anymore.
She just asked me not to pretend anymore and do what feels correct for me. If it was not for her i would not have left Natasha on the first place. I thank her for that. But i bet Natasha wont.

Later that day i was thinking about all my bad breakups. And how selfish i have been through out my life.
Listening to one directions story of my life and trying to humm with it.
I always sounded good in my head while humming any song.

When i was in 5th i got into school choir and have been singing songs, playing instruments and performing just for myself since then.
I have performed on stage for others too but i guess i never felt my song when i was on stage.

I slept thinking about all such stuff and it was a really good sleep with no worries or drama in my life. It always feels good when you re light hearted before going to bed making you sleep like a baby.

The next morning was a bit different i got bored the whole day, had nothing to do, no one to talk to. But i chose this by breaking up with my friend.

Later that night, i installed tinder.
Yess exactly a day after i broke up with my ex.
I was looking for a good conversation, or may be making new friends.
You know tinder has always suprised me with amazing matches. Suprisingly Natasha and i met on tinder and we were happy uptill the time she left for her home town, atleast i was.
Basically tinder is an app for dating, hookups, not for hookups people and a place to make new friends. Meet new people and share your deepest secret with them.
I believed that sharing your secret with a random is easier and safer than telling it to a known. A random person will judge and actually tell where i am wrong or help me to feel good about the things i have done or thoughts i had.
By 2-3 days i was done feeling bad about break up and just wanted to go to date.

There i matched with Aalia.