Avatar One Shots

The Fear

I sat in my room, my ghastly pale reflection staring back at me. In my wheelchair, sitting alone in the darkness of my mind. My hair was down, flowing around my shoulders in a silhouette of warmth, the tips just barely brushing towards my elbows.

It's only been a week since I left Republic City, and I have often found myself reoccurring the old times, playing them through my head like a mover, the fond times cascading through my brain, bringing back the joys and the tears.

I remember the first time I met Bolin and Mako, and when I joined the Fire Ferrets, and when I kicked Amon's Equality-loving butt. And also all of the tears, and heartbreak, and fear along with it.

I silently remembered these things, sometimes shedding a tear or two, before wiping the pain away with the back of my hand.

Day by day, people tell me to stay positive and have courage. But I can't. How can you have courage when you're broken? A shattered piece of mind in an endless void of darkness and pain.

Everyday, Asami, Mako, and Bolin sit in my room with me, talking about what's happening in the city, the new ProBending stats, and sometimes delivering messages from people in the city, always of hope.

They knew to stay away from anything that was even remotely close to the topic of bending, knowing that it just kills me inside to think about it. I only allow them to talk about our ProBending opponents and what they can do, so I know for when I get back out there.

If I get back out there.

If I keep telling myself. It's always if.

If Korra's strong enough.

If she can do it.

If I can prove it to myself.

But it's never enough. Knowing that I'll eventually get back into the groove of things, get strong enough to bend. All I want is to be able to bend, to find myself again, to be happy, and get my old fierce, kick-ass personality back.

I've gone through life knowing who I am, being the person I was born to be. But, with people telling you over and over, constantly, that you're half-baked, not good enough, you will never be needed, or you'll never be the person you want to be, how can I?

I may seem like I can deal with all this killjoy stuff going on around me, when in reality, I'm just as much of a killjoy as, well, a killjoy. And it's not fun, not being able to help and participate in training the new airbenders, even though I know Jinora's doing just fine on her own.

She's a master now. Our little TurtleDuck has grown up, at 14, and had her tattoos at the age of 12. It kills me seeing her all grown up, having her whole life ahead of her, being a mix of a child and an adult at the same time, but making it work. And I love her for that.

My life has been pretty much planned out: Master all four Elements, save world a couple times, win over the hearts of the people, go on some giant spiritual journey with someone I hate or love and come to find myself in a new way. But the thing I that I don't know who I am anymore. I keep thinking of myself as Korra: The Worst Avatar, it's not fun, not being able to do the job you were born to do.

But I can't say that I'll never recover or bend again, it's just everything on the mental and emotional side that I'm scared about.

Not knowing who I am.

It scares me.

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Okay, so I know that this was really sad compared to the last one.

The truth is, this started out as the flashback for the last one shot. I know, I know. This is really dramatic and sad and I guess you could call it angsty, (sorry, tumblr mind there)
But it's something that I wanted to do, because of Korra's emotions in the finale and what's coming up in Book 4.

Has anyone seen the trailer yet?

IT'S AMAZING AND IF YOU HAVEN'T GO SEE IT NOW.

GO.

DO IT.

Okay, well, I hope you guys like it as much as I do!

Bye!

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~S