The Imagination: A Scary Place

There once was a girl who liked a boy. It's a tale as old as time. The simple story of unrequited love. The girl was head over heels for somebody who could never love her back. It was as simple as that. She knew there could never be anything more but an innocent friendship. This is why she ignored her brain when it whispered for her to move closer to him, it's why she ignored her lips when they involuntarily curled into a smile at the mere thought of him, it's why she ignored the way her breath hitched, every time he said her name. But above of all, it's why

she ignored her heart.

She ignored it when it would tell her about love, and how beautiful It could be. She ignored it when it told her that he was the one who could make it beautiful. She ignored it because if she didn't, she would be the girl who believed that maybe, just maybe, something might become of her ever growing emotions. She would be the girl who thought she had a chance at love, who believed she deserved a chance at love.

She didn't

She wasn't allowed to be happy. She didn't even deserve his friendship. She knew she wasn't worthy of his love, because she wasn't worthy of his heart. To be worthy, you first have to be worth something. She wasn't worth the hassle that love comes with. The girl lives in her own little world, a world consisting of nothing but anguish and despair. Love was happiness, and happiness was foreign to her. Tell me, who would ever want to live with her in her world of torture? No one, no one would. This boy was so important. He was always just on. He did nothing but make her smile and make her feel valid. Something she hasn't felt in while. She loved him, not only for his giggle and his oh-so brown eyes, but because of how she felt when she was with him. The feelings were so deep, so wild. There was no control, they couldn't be tamed. Her love was so chaotic it wasn't capable of holding back. Which is why she had to distance herself from his presence, she had to distance herself from happiness. It was hard being away from him, but it was even harder being close to him. Who wants to live in a world where you can see the thing you want but not truly ever have it? She laughed and she smiled when he was near, when she had to see him. She smiled so bright and she laughed so loud in attempt to drown out the hollow cries that her heart screamed.

It's hard to move on from something that never was.

But it's even harder to move on from the thought of what could've been.