So I've been on antidepressants for a little more than six weeks. I feel better. Only just. Monday this week I had a really low day; the suicidal thoughts came back and I just wanted to lay in bed all day and sleep. But I want to feel better. There's so many things that I'm looking forward to in the future like university and driving and stuff. I just feel like my 'guardian angel' has been asleep for the past seventeen years, not caring what I do or how I feel. I don't wanna be depressed, it's a title I'm going to have for the rest of my life now. It's going to define my future. but I wanna change that. I'm going to change that.
