G.H.O.S.T

Chapter 1 : School

My eyes fly open. I'm still screaming, and I'm thrashing around in my blankets when my mum comes in. 'Ssshhh its ok Sara, it's just a nightmare, quiet love' she starts giving me a hug. I start sobbing into her shoulder, and ruining her night dress. I take in deep breaths of her familiar smell; of roses and lilies, and it begins to calm me down.

Once I'm calm enough she asks me what is wrong, and what I was dreaming about even though she knows. I tell her. My mum's mouth forms a tight line, and her blue eyes fill with tears, she starts shaking, she sobs sorry Sara over and over again. I tell her it's not her fault that I keep dreaming about what happened that fateful night on my fifth birthday, I'm seven now, and I still remember it as clearly as almost as if it was yesterday. We had been following the same process every night for the past 2 years now ever since it happened. I have the same nightmare, wake up screaming, mum comes in comforts me, she ends up crying, because she feels guilty, we go downstairs and have my favorite; pancakes, and cream, and then I go and sleep with mum in her bed. You think that we would have gotten used to it by now, but we haven't...

I hate school, its pure torture. All the girls gang up on me, and call me names; like teacher's pet, and stupid. The school building is horrible as well, it's dreary and grey, there's no grass, and there is a fence surrounding the school, it reminds me of a prison, and were the prisoners. The only place that I do like about the school is the councilor's office - but not the councilor. I think she's really nosey, asking me how I feel, and why I don't try harder at making friends. Is she blind? I do try making friends, well... I did at the beginning, but I don't anymore, because they all gang up on me, and call me names when I even come near them.

I like the councilor's office, because it's always warm, and it smells of talcum powder, also there are cushions covering the floor, and there are dolls littering the floor. My favorite doll is Maria, she is probably the ugliest doll, but she's my favorite and the prettiest to me, she has long, wavy, dirty, coppery coloured, hair, and button eyes, she wears a blue dress that reaches her ankles, and has wooden black shoes. I just love visiting her, and talking to her, and we share secret's; like how horrible men are, and how we will never get married, and married people are stupid. Ms. Phillip the councilor just sits there watching us talk, with a serious expression, and with her lips pressed together tightly, almost as if she's swallowed a lemon. She also tells me stupid things, like if I know that Marias not real, and that's she's just a doll, and then I tell to stop butting in and that of course Marias real, and that Ms. Phillip must be deaf not to hear her. She gets really narked when I say this, and tells me to stop being rude, but I just ignore her, and start talking to Maria again. I hate leaving Maria, and Ms. Phillip has to call for help from another teacher to get me to leave, because I start to throw a tantrum, and kick.

School was horrid today, there was a new pupil today called Sasha, and she isn't stupid, and all the other girls look up to her, EVEN BECKY! I thought that she would be nice to me, because she was as sweet a sugar cubes in front of the teacher, and she was all dimples, and smiles. However in the playground, she pushed me over right into a puddle, and yanked my hair so hard I started crying, and then all the girls started calling me baby. I couldn't wait to go and tell Maria, but when I got to the councilors office all the pillows were gone, and...so was Maria. Ms. Phillip said that they had thrown away all the pillows, and dolls, because they were getting dirty, I kicked up such a fuss that they had to call my Aunt Julia, and I had to get taken from the school premises kicking and screaming. Aunt Julia is normally very kind, but today she was furious with me, and told me to grow up, and that how could I be so attached with a stupid doll, and to stop acting like a baby. She dropped me off at home without giving me her usual hug.

My mum was rather sympathetic - NOT! She agreed with Aunt Julia, and the school, she said that I wasn't trying hard to make friends and that I was seven, and that I had to start growing up, and to stop playing with dolls. But she did say it gently; she never shouted it like Aunt Julia did. My mum then told me to go and change, because we would be having supper in a few minutes, I went upstairs to my bedroom crying; not because I'd been shouted at, but because I'd lost my only friend.

I decided to put on a long blue dress just like Marias, and where clumpy black shoes just like Maria, but I didn't have any, so I went to go and look in my mum's room.

I loved my mum's room, it smelt just like she does, and she has a desk that's covered in her makeup, and my old books that I used to love. Also there are photos of me and mum; with me as a baby, me getting ice cream all over me, but my favorite picture is the one where I'm on a motor boat with my hair streaming behind me, with my hands stretched out, like I'm flying, and my mum is holding my legs, and laughing. Her corn coloured hair blowing out behind her, and my mum has a proper smile on her face, not the strained ones she uses today... I found a pair of gorgeous black shoes, they looked exactly like Marias, I also found a multi coloured scrunchy, and tied my silky, smooth midnight hair into a pony tail. I put on some of my mums make up as well; bright red lipstick, and some blusher, and red eye shadow.