It's you.. it's always been you..

Part 1

I was 16 when my mom passed, I still remember moments with her vividly. With each year passing by it seemed like the memories i never wanted to let go were slowly fading. Everyday before i sleep i rethink of a moment, trying to hold on to it. Not wanting it to fade away someday. I remember when everything was ok but now, my life is filled with darkness. I don't want friends, i don't want anybody. I like being alone, that's why home is my favorite place. My dad hasn't been the same since, he's to far gone. It's fine, im fine on my own. I just spent my summer isolated in my room. Blankets covering my window letting in no sun, only leaving my room to eat, and music is now all i have. I don't really care though, im used to it. It's been 6 months since my moms death, or should i say the day my whole life changed. I'm not complaining, it's just life and i've accepted that life is a bitch and then you die

I wrote in my diary, or notebook as i like to call it. Diary sounds like something a prep would write in about boys. Which im not into.. AT ALL. I'm not gay or anything, i'm just numb and prefer to be alone. Well, im just going to stop thinking to myself now cause i have to go shopping for school which is in a couple days, yippee.