AbihGya SS ~ Frozen

Chapter 3: The Deal

It was adolescence all over for me again - that typical feeling, when you realize you are changing and there is nothing you can do about? I was going through that again! My foolish romantic instinct was slowly starting to cloud my rationality and I was happily letting it happen with a fluttery belly. Once the metamorphosis was over, and I had bowed down before my love for Abhi, I decided to tell him about my feelings.

There were two things I was absolutely sure about. One, I was as much in love with Abhi as Simran was with Raj in DDLJ. Two, I knew, if Raj ever existed in real life, he would just be like Abhi. I thought these were reason enough to go ahead with.

To this date, no one ever got me - but, I NEVER proposed to Abhi. Proposing him was never my intention. I didn't want to know what he felt for me - it wasn't important for me, I wasn't looking for reciprocation. I just felt overwhelmed by my feeling for him. It was the strongest I had ever felt so far for anyone - and I simply thought he had the right to know, that someone loved him thus.

By then, Abhi and I had started interacting outside office too. We had gone for coffee a couple of times - while we were on the way to meet clients or while returning. We had gone for his sister's birthday shopping and that day we had lunch outside too! I had even accompanied him to one of his endorsement shoots - and I had noticed that, though he always made it look accidental, but he had held my hands a number of times, and every time he would let go, I always felt a slight reluctance in him.

Thus when I decided to tell him about my feelings for him, I wasn't worried about extreme consequences.

It was a Saturday evening, when I had met him for coffee. I wasn't shaky or formal when I told him the biggest truth of my life - you can blame my childishness or my innocent vulnerability for it - your choice - but for me, my love for him was the most precious gift I could offer and I was just being generous.

"You know what Abhi, I love you." I smiled.

He stared at me for a second and then flashed his adorable smirk, "Love you too babe"

"No. I mean the serious-wala love"

"As in?"

"As in not the fan girl love, or the crush love - DDLJ love"

"DDLJ love?"

"Okay, I will explain - it's not the way you love the chef's special Risotto at Benjamins, it's the way you love daadi's handmade aloo parantha!"

"Ah. That's a lot of love..but chashmish..the thing is, I...you know me, you handle my damsel diary, there is nothing hidden from you..so"

"Oh, don't get me wrong, I am not proposing to you!"

"You're not? Then what was this?"

"I just needed to tell you. It's such an overwhelming feeling that I couldn't just keep it to myself, and not share with you. I had to tell you. But it was just information for you. I am not expecting a response from you. I mean I know your exploits man, after all I handle the damsel diary" I finished with a laugh

He looked startled for the first time, "I don't need to give you an answer.." he mumbled to himself. He was then quiet for a few seconds - I was watching him and sipping coffee. A few moments passed, then he looked up brightly, "Okay, you told me, so I know. Now, you want to have another peanut butter muffin?"

***

Our equation, both at a personal level and at work had not been affected at my announcement - we were both very comfortable with each other, he still joked around and I still laughed at his jokes - however there was one tiny negligible change - the activities related to his damsel diary had reduced drastically. When I questioned him, he joked around it, but never gave me the real reason.