Even A White Rose Has A Black Shadow

Chapter 12

You guys, I don't know what happened! I didn't really have time to continue writing back in 2014 (haven't updated in over two years - shame on me like seriously) due to Uni duties, finding new friends and just getting used to this new chapter in my life (pun definitely intended, sorry not sorry). Also I was kind of struggling with this part of the story and didn't know how to get to a certain point with Harry and Ella that I knew I wanted to get to... Now 2 years later, just by accident I saw that for some unknown reason I gained a number of followers in the last couple of weeks and two of you were even asking me for a potential update (Thaaaaaank you so much!!!) and maybe that's exactly the motivation I needed to try and get back into writing :) I really wanna make this story amazing for you guys but also for myself - in the last 2 years I never really stopped thinking about it! So here is a brand new chapter - I hope you enjoy it! Feedback is very welcome, as always!

Love, M.

The short drive was heaven and hell both at once. Heaven because of Harry's smell that had filled the inside of Paul's car in a matter of seconds - just as well as my dizzy mind, I might add. Harry's presence was pervasive to say the least. It was not only his heavenly scent that made my insides churn but also his body heat that seemed to radiate even more than the sun on this beautiful day in June and the constant deep buzz of his incredibly soothing voice. However, the best - or maybe the worst - of all were the little glances he flashed me every now and again. The sparkling green of his eyes combined with his handsome subtle smile caught me off guard every single time.

Keep calm or this will end up on the next season of Disaster Date. Does this show still exist, though? Oh, and this ain't a date! Stop fantasising, Missus Fangirl.

It was hell because I needed a hell - literally - of a lot of self-control to not bite my nails - which I have never done before and there was no way of starting this stupid habit since my nails were amongst the few things I actually liked about myself -, constantly checking on my hair, blushing beet red and getting clammy hands. I was quite lucky to have dealt with all this for a majority of my lifetime because I used to be the shiest and most self-conscious girl on planet earth. Until that day I had thought that I had gotten all of this quirks down to a minimum but I guessed, Harry Styles brought it all back adding a fluttering little heart and a nervous giggle to the list.

Paul had told Harry about my knowledge of cars, which seemed to impress him just as much as it had every other man who had ever tried to tell me something about cars that I hadn't known already. So, it was a good subject to start off with. I was awestruck when Paul mentioned Harry's Ford Capri 1970 which then turned to starstruck because the young man sitting next to me tried playing it down like the humble guy he was.

The car turned into a little alley way when I was raving about a little road trip that I had done with my older cousin and his Audi R8 about two months ago. 'The streets were deserted so we could just speed along, it was amazing really.' Harry chuckled and shook his head a little. 'What is so funny?', I asked and immediately felt my cheeks heating up even more. The emerald of his eyes lit up for a second. 'It's just the fact you get so excited about cars and just driving around. I don't think I really know any other girl that would enjoy a road trip - just driving without an aim... No, probably not', he said, still shaking his head every now and again so that a strand of his curls fell onto his forehead. He pushed it back with one of his big hands.

'It's weird, right?', I asked, 'But I just really like the feeling of it. When you don't have to be at a certain place at a certain time and you can just drive. If  you feel like it you can go fast, but if you want to, you can just take your time and not really care about anything. You can stop at any point or turn around when you've had enough.' God, what the actual hell am I talking about? Very interesting...NOT! 'Do you like that?', when Harry saw my questioning look he added, 'I mean not having to care about things?' I shrugged my shoulders and thought about it for a moment. 'I guess, I'm just one of those people who always care a bit too much and overthink stuff. So everything that gets my mind off of things is great! Like running and apparently driving...'