Bi The Way... // Zane X Travis // ON HOLD

Chapter #1

::Zane's POV::

Dear Diary...
I'm 15 years old. I just got out of the 9th grade, I'm going into 10th. Am I happy that I'm almost out of school? Definitely. With myself? Irene no. One word. Depression. That describes my entire life. Well, since the 6th grade that is. I also cut. Bad. Been doing that since 6th grade too. My older brother Garroth and my younger brother Vylad are the only ones who know, along with Mom and Dad since they kinda HAVE to know. I can't tell Aphmau. I love her, but I also don't need her checking in on me every second of every day... I know she means well, but I don't like the attention. She won't remember me in a few months anyway. Everyone forgets me. Either that or they leave. Even my best friend, Travis, leaves me most of the time. We hang out a good bit, but he always ends up having to leave. I'm surprised I let myself let him in... I shut myself off for a specific reason. He knows why, too. He knows what someone did, and he surprisingly hasn't blabbed his big mouth about my problems either. One reason I close myself off is because when I actually do open up, I'm taken advantage of. This one girl I actually liked... I forgot her name. This was back in middle school when we all came up with dumbass Snapchat usernames. I told her about my problem... I even told her about me being bisexual. And she told all of her friends. I felt invaded, betrayed... like she didn't actually care about me, even though she told me she did. I'm fine though. I always am. I'm so alone, I have more than enough time to overthink about my depressing life. Shit, I have all summer. Maybe I'll be alive by the time school gets back in.
~Zane

•••••

I close my journal and put it back in the drawer I got it out of. I hear my mother call us to dinner, so I roll down my sleeves and walk downstairs. Since I'm about to eat, I left my mask on my bedside table.

"Hey ZuZu!" Mom smiles brightly as she hands me my plate.

"Hey Mom.." I smile a small smile and sit down at the dinner table.

"Hey Baby Brother! Have a good day?" Garroth sits down beside me, his chair making a loud noise as it probably scratches up the floor.

"I guess so... nothing different happened. I went to the park with Travis, we went out for lunch, he had better things to do, I came home, and was bored all afternoon." I sigh, picking at my food.

"Why aren't you eating son?" Dad looks up at me from his newspaper, which he brings down just a little bit.

"I'm not that hungry." I say softly. Garroth has always been Dad's favorite. Not that he doesn't love me and Vylad, he just prefers Garroth. Wether he means to or not, he makes that beyond clear.

"Is that a side affect to his medicine?" My father looks over at my mother, who's handing Vylad his plate.

"I don't think so, no." She says, looking at my depression medicine.

"You need to eat, Zane." Dad glances back at me before he continues to read his newspaper.

"Is half good enough?" I ask, looking at Mom.

"I suppose so..." she sighs, sitting down with her personal plate.

"Are you okay Big Bro?" Vylad asks as he looks at me, an obvious worried expression on his face.

"I'm okay.." I flash him a small smile and force myself to start eating.

~•~•~•~•~

I'm laying on my bed staring at my ceiling when my phone goes off. I lazily hold it above my head.

~~~
Trav💚 = Travis
Z = Zane
~~~

•••••
Trav💚: Hey, are you busy?
Z: No, why
Trav💚: I feel bad about leaving so soon earlier, wanna hang out?
Z: Sure
Trav💚: Midnight walk later?
Z: Meet ya at the park around 11:30 👍
Trav💚: 😁
•••••

It honestly feels really good to know he actually cares a little bit about me. I didn't think he cared at all...

I have a good four hours before I need to meet Travis at the park. What do I do within those four hours? Nothing. Cause I have no life.

~~~
::Bold italics are Zane's conscious talking to him::
~~~

"You could always relieve some of your stress~"

Why would I do that?

"Because you have nothing better to do~"

Can you like, shut the fuck up for once in your life?

"You mean our life?"

If I could cut you out of my brain, I most definitely would.

~•~•~•~•~

I arrived at the park a few minutes early. I sat on the bench and waited for Travis.

I ended up adding two new cuts to the collection on my arm, while I was bored for four hours. All together, there's now around... 14 cuts, maybe? Along a few scars. But hey, once ya start, ya can't stop.

I'm scrolling through Instagram when Travis walks up to me. He's wearing my favorite green hoodie of his, and his hair is messily thrown to one side on his head. It's honestly kind of attractive.

Even if I did ever like him, he goes for girls. I wouldn't have a shot anyway.

"Hey Zane.." he smiles at me as he sits down beside me.

"Hey.." I smile a little. He's seen me without my mask before, so I just left it at home.

"I'm sorry I had to leave earlier. I didn't want to, but Katelyn needed me." He says. It's always Katelyn... he's has the biggest crush on her since his Freshman year of high school.

"Don't worry about it," I chuckle, "I'm used to it..." I mumble the last part where he can't hear it.

::Travis's POV::

"...I'm used to it..." he mumbles. I think he thought I didn't hear him, but I did. I won't tell him that though, since I know his intention was for me not to.

"So, is there anywhere specific you wanna walk to?" I ask.

"Not really, you?" He puts his phone away and looks at me.

I go to answer him, but I get lost in his gorgeous blue eye. I'd say eyes but... he got hit with a rock in his other one, so now it's more of a faded blue color, almost a lilac-y color. He also keeps his hair over that one, so you only get to make eye contact with his left eye. It's honestly kinda cute.

"Earth to Travis..." Zane's waving his hand in front of my face and I soon snap back into reality.

"Oh... n-no, nowhere specific." I stutter.

"Nice stutter, Garroth..." Zane chuckles at my stutter, but I playfully pout and cross my arms.

"That wasn't funny." I say as I look at him.

"Okay ya big baby, lets go." He pulls me off of the bench and we begin to walk. Where to? Eh, we aren't sure. We just enjoy each other's company.