The no good life of Alexis Langdon

Chapter 1 The move

"I can lift you up!!! I can show you what you want to see, and take you where you want to be!!! You can be my luck!!! Even if the sky is falling down I know that we'll be safe and sound!!!"

Is all I hear pumping into my ears. I'm doing piece of crap homework from Mrs. Hangler. Yes that's her name. what kind of name is that?? Anyway the homework's a piece of crap. In fact, the teacher's a piece of crap. On the first day of school we had homework, and I'm in eighth grade!!! At the beginning of school, my friends called her "Hooker." And I said,

"Just give her a chance."

But by now I'm fed up with her, so you know what screw her!!!

Anyway now that we got that out of the way, what's up? My name is Alexis, but the last person who called me that got there ass kicked. So call me Lexy. And if you couldn't tell my tone of language, I'm a tomboy, if you will. And my best friends are, John and Roger. There the kids that called Mrs. Hangler a hooker. And these guys are pretty cool, to my standards. For example, last year in 7th grade, someone dared me to splatter ketchup all over the ceiling in the cafeteria.

"Hell no. We'll not without pay. How much you got?" I ask desperately needing the money at the time.

"I got five bucks!" John shouts

"Deal."

I take a ketchup packet and splatter it high in the sky. The spotless white ceiling dyed for life from the act I had just committed.

"Ha ha" the hole table I kid you not erupts with laughter.

I guess the teacher got suspicious because she came over to investigate. When people noticed this they stopped laughing at once.

"What did you do this time Mrs. Everdeen." She says.

You see my last name isn't really Everdeen. It's Langdon. She calls me that because last year we were reading the hunger games ok. And I turned around in my seat and whispered to Roger,

"It would be funny if Katniss jumped right through that window and shot her in the face!" I say laughing.

When I turn around everybody's staring at me.

"I must have been a little to loud" I think to myself.

"We'll if you really like, um, Katniss that's it, Katniss then how about that will be your new name in this class.

"Pssh, fine by me." I say in a snotty manner. In fact that's the way I talk to all my teachers that are jerks.

Anyway, the teacher comes over and asks me what I have done.

"Why do you always come to me?" I ask "what are you sexist? Why don't you ask one of the guys around here?"

"We'll mrs. Langdon you do have a reputation to....

"Wow now your blaming me for my reputation."

The rest of the kids sit at the table in silence, one because they hate this teacher as we'll, and two, there all weak links, we'll except for John and Roger. And those kids know if they rat me out, I'll take care of them on my own time.

I look up and just now realized that the teacher is standing right under where I had splattered the ketchup on the ceiling. And I also just realized the ketchup was in little clumps, and looked like it was going to drip.

"Lexy! I am your teacher, and you will show me some damn respect!!!"

The whole table gasps. Not even I have heard a teacher cuss before.

--------SPLAT

The whole table erupts with laughter again. The teacher reaches up to see what had just landed on her head, and when she sees the gooey red ketchup on her fingers, I swear to god, satan went off in her head.