Improvise or Die

7

     I got up in the morning and saw Mac somberly sitting on the couch. I spoke up. "You ok?"
     "Yeah. Why? How are you doing?"
     "You just look kind of upset," I explained.
     "Just thinking about the fact that you could have been killed by Murdoc in the same room I could have been killed in. I never wanted to have to go back there. It wasn't a time I would like to revisit," He told me. I suspected there was more to the story but let it go. "But I needed to get you out for your sake and for Jack's."
     "I'm sorry you had to. I appreciate it though." This was all I was able to get out, not really knowing what to say when I could tell there was more to how he was feeling.
     "Don't apologize. I was happy to get you out. How are you?" he asked honestly. It was rare to find someone who asked that question and actually cared to know the answer. The more time I spent with Mac, the more I realized how much I missed feeling cared about.
     "I'm ok. Just super on edge and paranoid."
     "That's totally normal and makes perfect sense. What do you say we go get you some clothes and stuff?" Mac asked cheerfully.
     "Sure. On the way, can I get to know you a little bit? I trust you but I don't know you hardly at all."
     "Yeah of course. You can ask whatever you want or talk about anything." We got in his car and drove off to the department store. "What do you want to know?"
     "How do you know so much and know all about crazy ways to get out of things and situations?" I asked first. That seemed like such a specific skill set.
     "Well, I went to MIT for college and then I worked defusing bombs for DXS. My dad was the one who helped me get into the mindset of finding my way out of problems, nearly everything was an opportunity to test me on ways to get out of things, and school helped me know all the physics, chemistry, and math behind just about everything I've encountered. My grandpa pushed me to continue exploring things when it became just him and I," he explained.
     "Your grandpa pushed you? Your parents not around much like mine?" I questioned.
     "My dad dropped out of my life when I was about 10 and only recently came back into it. My mom got really sick and passed away when I was a kid."
     "I'm sorry, Mac. I didn't mean to pry."
     "Don't worry about it. You didn't know and you have every right to ask about whatever you want. Feel free to keep asking questions. If there's something I don't want to share, I'll tell you."
     "Most rewarding part of the job?" I really didn't see much of an upside to this line of work.
     "Easy. Saving lives."
     "Hardest part?"
     "Not always being able to save people."
     "Does that happen a lot?" I asked hesitantly.
     "No. But when it does, it hits home. There was one case recently," he added. I watched as his expression shifted from fairly calm and neutral to somber. His eyes glistened slightly and I could see the pain behind his eyes.
     "Mac, I know you can't give details but if you want to talk about it, you can."
     "I'd rather not, but thanks." We were about 5 minutes out from the store. "Any other questions? We're pretty close to the store. We can always continue after if you want."
     "Are you sure I can stay? I know it shouldn't be your responsibility to babysit me every day." I asked softly. "I can't afford to go anywhere else and don't feel safe to, but I can if you need me to." I just didn't want him to feel like I was adding a burden to his life.
     "Hey, it's not babysitting. You need a place to stay and I have the room. It's not a problem at all."
     "Thanks. Is it weird that ever since being here I've just missed my dad more and more? He didn't have a lot of time to check in with me as it was, but I want to see him. I need a big dad hug from him and for him to promise me it will be ok. I know you said I'm justified in being upset, but I don't really know how to handle this trauma," I told him.
     "It's not weird at all. I totally understand. I'm not Jack, but I'll be here for you as much as I can be. I can promise it will be ok and if you want a hug, I can give you one. I can't tell you how to handle the trauma. Everyone copes in different ways. You'll have to figure out the best way to cope for you." We pulled into a parking spot as he finished up his thought. "Now, before you object, I'm buying. You've been through enough. You don't need to spend your hard earned money on necessities that you should have had in the first place if Murdoc didn't escape from prison. We'll go get you clothes and anything else that you want from the department stores, then pick up shampoo and whatever else you need on the way home." I nodded. We got out and Mac held me in a hug. "I promise it'll be ok."
     "Thank you." I replied into his chest. He felt warm and protective. Not just warm in temperature, but the kind of warm that invites you in with utmost kindness.
     "You're welcome." We went into the department store and I looked for clothes while Mac sat by the dressing room. I tried on a bunch and found stuff that fit. I even found a cute dress in case Mac decided to ask me out in the future. He didn't seem to mind at all and patiently waited for me. We stopped into a bookstore and music store since I knew that I'd be spending a lot of time bored while he was on ops. We were partway through the bookstore when Mac got a notification on his phone. "Hey, Matty needs me at work. We've gotta go." We left and went to the Phoenix. We got me a visitor badge and went in.
     "Mac, what are you doing bringing her in here? You know this is all classified," Matty objected.
     "You know I don't have a choice. I'm not leaving her alone at my house and she needs to be safe. Plus we were out and you needed me here. She knows some of what we do anyway, we'll just make sure she doesn't release any info."
     "Matty, my lips are sealed. Nothing gets shared with anyone and I won't get in the way."
     "Ok, but this can't be a daily thing," Matty replied. I sat there quietly and fiddled with a paperclip, trying to bend it into a cool shape. They went over the case and I half paid attention. Apparently there was a string of random robbery-murders in Spain all done by some terrorist guy. They needed to predict the next location and stop him. While they were talking, I kept noticing Mac looking at Desi and Desi looking back at him. They both had a look in their eyes of desperation and it destroyed me. I didn't say anything and they left for their mission.