Miracles do really happen (KamiShinso)

bloody blades

Kaminari cut his skin over and over again. That night, after the police took him to the station for questioning, was the worst night of his life. Kaminari was walking home and decided to stop by a convenience store to buy a big pack of different types of sharp blades.

Kaminari heard that cutting your skin helps reduce stress levels and helps you feel better. The way the sharp tips glided into his skin, tearing it in half, made Kaminari feel something other than empty and worthless. Him cutting his skin, showed him that he was still there and capable of feeling things, anything.

Kaminari sat on the bathroom floor, looking over at the bathtub where his mother once laid dead. He grabbed the blade he especially liked, a silver piece of metal with gold flower carvings, and started on his left arm.

Kaminari was very new to the whole idea of self-harming and he didn't know if you were supposedly cut a certain length or a certain deepness. He just winged it. Kaminari lined the razor at one end of his wrist horizontally and pressed harshly while dragging it across his wrist.

Blood started seeping out of the open wound and Kaminari felt instant relief. The deep red color just had a relaxing element to it. He continued over and over again, going up his arm. Kaminari stopped after about 40 cuts, he was getting dizzy.

~Time Skip to Monday Morning~

Kaminari's annoying alarm woke him up. It was 5 am, Monday. "UGH!!!" he screamed stretching his arms out. Kaminari winced at the pain of his skin stretching.

On Sunday, Kaminari stayed at home and cut from morning till midnight. Both his arms were covered in nasty cuts and dried blood. Shinso texted Kaminari a million times, but Kaminari just silenced his phone.

Kaminari lost his ability to believe anything he receives that is good, will stay. Shinso was just another false happiness ready to leave him at any moment.

The texts read:
S: Hey what's up?
S: Do you want to hang out?
S: Are you alright?
S: Did I do or say something?
S: I'm getting worried
S: you never ignore your phone
S: Kaminari please answer

And they continued on like that.

Kaminari got up and started getting ready for school. He first rinsed off the dried blood on his wrists, put Vaseline on them, and wrapped them in bandages.

Kaminari wore a thick sweater, ensuring his wrists weren't noticeable. He put on ripped, black skinny jeans and white vans. Kaminari went into the kitchen and just didn't have an appetite.

Cooking reminded him of all the times Hikari entered the kitchen and complemented the smell and the food. Now, Cooking was ruined for Kaminari and he skipped breakfast entirely.

Kaminari grabbed his school bag and left the empty, sad apartment. On his walk to school, everything reminded him of his mom. The singing birds and how she loved birds. The roses and how she always smelled like roses. Even the damn sun, Hikari was always a bright woman and loved the color yellow.

Kaminari entered the classroom and went straight to his desk. His other friends noticed how he looked sad and angry. Midoriya, being the sweet cinnamon bun he is, was super worried. "U-uh D-Denki? Are y-you alright?" Kaminari, not even looking up, blankly answered. "Why?"

Midoriya felt even more worried. Kaminari surely wouldn't sound so empty and ignore his friends? Would he? "W-well it's j-just you look, well you look different. Not a bad different but a sad different." Midoriya replied nervously looking down.

Kaminari really didn't want to talk to anyone, especially Midoriya because he felt like he was going to explode in someone's face. "I'm really tired, that's all." Kaminari said, in hopes Midoriya would walk away. Midoriya looked back at Kaminari one more time. "O-ok well, i-if there is anything you w-want to talk about, I'm here." And with that, Midoriya went back to Uraraka.