Friends With Benefits

11: "Nothing More"

Jinyoung put his used plate in the sink right after he finished eating the breakfast which he just cooked. It's just fried eggs, since he cannot cook anything else. Most students his age live by ordering food out, so people can't expect him to be good in the kitchen.

He drank the glass of water he poured for himself then heard the doorbell ring upon closing the fridge. When he opened the door, he saw Jaebum standing outside. "Good morning." The older greeted.

"Good morning." Jinyoung greeted back, opening the door wider to let the latter in. "I'll just fix my things back inside my room. You could wait here on the couch."

Jaebum did as what he told. He offered him coffee but the older said no thanks so Jinyoung just made his way to his room, not wanting to make Jaebum wait longer.

When they're about to leave, Jaebum asked. "Mark already left?"

With a small shrug, he answered. "Yeah. Let's go."

Jinyoung sighed when Jaebum just nodded and followed him outside.

It's something Jinyoung doesn't want to talk about. Mark, frequently leaving for school way earlier than he needed to. Mark, not spending much time here in the apartment, missing dinner or breakfast together. Mark, acting different. Jinyoung doesn't want to talk about how it seems like Mark is creating this distance between them, like he's drawing some line. He doesn't want to talk about how Mark changed and started avoiding him. And he certainly doesn't want to talk about how and when it started.

"How I wish Jinyoung... How I wish you were mine."

Jinyoung tried to get his mind off of that night. That night after Mark held him gently, with utmost care he never felt from the blonde before. And how he whispered those words, probably thinking he was already asleep.

Jinyoung is not sure whether he shoud be happy that he was still awake that time and was able to hear what Mark said. But he surely ain't happy when he woke up the morning after, alone in Mark's bed. Sure, they cuddled only once, and he knows Mark isn't the type who cuddles after sex. He knows that. But something in those words and how Mark said it, made Jinyoung think and hope different.

It's only this time that he'll admit to himself that he did expect that just like the last time, he'll wake up wrapped inside Mark's arms, with his face burried in the blonde's neck, sniffing his scent. He expected that both of them would lie there, limbs tangled with one another, refusing to get up from bed although they have classes at nine. He expected that he would wake up to the feel of Mark's fingers running through his hair as the blonde plays with it, while looking at him with fondness in those brown eyes. He expected that he would hear him say those words again, this time, much clearer.

Maybe his hopes were too high and far from possible, but Mark's words made him feel like he could at least hope. Mark's words stirred something inside him, which he doesn't know. But before he could even start to find out about it, or feel more of it, there he sees Mark's side of the bed, empty. Never did Jinyoung felt so cold. Only that time.

"Hey Jinyoung?" His attention was caught by Jaebum who just parked his car. They already reached school. "You okay?"

It has been more than a week now, and Jaebum has been fetching him from the apartment and driving them both to school. Previously it was Jackson's job, and then turned into Mark's. But like he said, things changed after that night. At first, Jinyoung needed to take the bus, but when Jaebum learned about it, the older suggested about fetching him. Jinyoung first thought of asking about Youngjae, but then remembered that Mark was still pursuing the younger. He isn't sure why though. Is it still for him? Is Mark still doing it for him, even after he asked him to stop?