“After the plane crash, I opened my eyes and found myself lying on a bed wrapped with white cloth. I realized I was in a hospital. I found my sister on my left side crying and holding my hand so tight. My body was in so much pain. I can’t even look straight to my left side where my sister standing. But I try so hard just to ask,
“Why are you crying?”
“Where are mom and dad are they okay?”
She did not answer me. Instead she hugged me and cried out loud saying,
“Kuya, mom and dad had died right on the plane crash.”
I was shocked with what I heard. It was like I’ve been bumped by a ten wheeler truck back and forth.
“It was my fault.” I mumbled.
“No, Kuya it’s not, don’t say that.” Angela said while she’s crying.
That day was so frustrating. That day I feel the most unforgettable pain that ever stroke me.
Few days past, my body had been totally recovered but my heart still pressed out of the thorns I’ve been feeling of losing the people I’ve ever love.
I ask God, If am I so stubborn to make him punished me like that.
I was so depressed and frustrated on the night before I make the thing that I did. I was so downed. All was like a doom of pain that makes me feel guilty.
“The next day, I found myself standing on the highest floor of a high building. I jumped, my life is so miserable. It will never be worth living for.” I ended my story with tears falling. But I tried my very best to smile at Jelsha, though it was fake.
“How I wish that life could be given to someone who wants it and not to someone who hates it. Jelsha said.
It’s my turn now to listen to her reason on persisting that life is worth living for.
“Since birth all I wish is a long life to cherish with my family, a long life to discover new things and long life to live happily and experience the goodness of the Lord.” She smiled after saying these lines.
“Doctors said that my heart has a hole, it makes me weak and this may not further my existence in this world. All my life, I am afraid every night to close my eyes, afraid that it will never be opened again and see the beautiful light of the sun. I am afraid not to see my family smiling at me and not to see the blessings of the Lord and His goodness.”
“I fight even though my body becomes weak as day pass and pass by. I fight though the pain is devouring me physically. And I fight because I want to be with my family. Today is my operation. Today my body will be on a test if it will survive the pain. But I’ll be the one who will decide, I want to live and survive.
“Yes, life is worth living if you have your family. So now you understand why I said life is not worth living?” I lost my parents and it was my fault. I interrupted.
“Don’t you consider your sister as your family?” she asked. What she said made me realize I have my sister who depends on me.
“Did you even think of her before you jumped and said that your life is not worth living?” she continued.
Hearing her words was like I was slapped with the truth
“Did you even think how she will be if even her brother whom she admired had died because of being weak, in accepting the truth that everyone in the world will be taken if that was the right time for them to go on and rest on God’s side? You are so immature! You love life because you feel joy and you feel happy but you hate it because you felt the sudden pain that struck you. Is that fair?”
“You are selfish. You just only think about yourself. You jumped because you don’t want to feel the pain? Then you should know by now how much pain you had brought to your sister. The pain that she feel right now is doubled than what you had.
I cried out loud and stood up as Jelsha stopped speaking.
“I want to live, I want to be back. I don’t want to die. Now, I know the purpose of God why my life was spared from that plane crash.”
U/N: Who wants a dedication?
