1. Your car chirps like a bird or plays a tune in reverse
2. You have a rosary on your car rear view mirror
3. Your car horn can make three or more different sounds
4. You have those air fresheners in a bottle
5. You own a Mercedes Benz and call it a ‘Chedeng’
6. Your car has curb feelers on it
7. You have a fake banana display attached to your car window
8. You own a huge van conversion
9. You do not try to avoid pedestrians
10. A traffic cop says “your license expired eight years ago”
11. A road sign that says “Dangerous curve, Death toll 19″ causes you to make another accident
12. For you a yellow light means ” go paster”
13. A traffic cop is known to you as a “crocodile”
14. You refer to a female driver as a “lesbian”
15. You insist on fitting 8 people into a taxi, much to the distress of the driver, and say, ‘we’re making ‘kandong’