Wild Girl

Chapter 11: Is This Love?

Nick and I did a great job by avoiding John and Simon the past 3 days. We spent the whole time between the bed, the hot tub and the beach and it was amazing. Nick and I were getting closer and I feel like we already forgot about what we talked about 3 days earlier.

At that moment, it felt good, but that's exactly how it felt with John and Simon, so I didn't want to get my hopes up. I had no idea what was going to happen next, but for now I was living for the moment.

Even though Nick and I did good by avoiding John and Simon, I knew it was going to be matter of time before we crossed paths with any of them, after all, we were staying on the same place and our rooms were next to each other.

Nick and Roger went to the beach and I stayed in my room for a while, because I was taking a call from home. After the call, I was going to join them, but on the way there, I crossed paths with Simon.

I faked that I didn't see him, but he knew I did

- It's that's how it's going to be? We are just going to ignore each other for the rest of the trip?

- It's not exactly what I'd want but I am just trying to avoid any more situations.

- I am not John, you know? You can talk to me.

- Do you really want to talk? I mean, you weren't exactly happy when you found out that I was coming.

- Can I explain you that?

- It is really necessary?

- Yes, it is.

- Alright then.

- Come on, let's go to the bar.

- Nick is waiting for me.

- He can wait 5 more minutes.

I went with Simon to the bar. I ordered a pina colada, I was trying to pay for it myself, but Simon wouldn't allow me.

- I invited you, okay? I am not going to let you pay.

- Okay, fine... - I was feeling annoyed already

- Listen. The reason what I didn't want you to come it's because I recently got back with my ex and I still have feelings for you and I don't want Fiona to feel uncomfortable.

- Wait, you have feelings for me?

- Of course, I told you, didn't I?

- Yeah, but I didn't think it was that serious.

- I was falling hard for you, Olivia but you told me you didn't want to get attached so I felt that the best thing to do was to stand back.

- This has been a roller coaster of emotions for me. I don't even know what I feel right now or what I want. I am so confused. – I said as I take my hands to my head

- I really like you, Olivia, I wish you would have given me the chance to get to know you better but, I guess you preferred to give that chance to Nick.

- Simon, you are not helping.

- Aren't you dating Nick?

- I have no idea what I am doing.

- You haven't talked to Nick about it?

- Yes, we have. He knows that this is not serious, but why does it have to get so complicated?

- We are humans, we want sex, but we also want affection and sometimes it's inevitable to get feelings for someone.

- Can I ask you something?

- Sure

- Do you believe that is possible to love more than one person at the same time?

- Yes, I think it is. Is that what you think it's happening?

- I don't know.

- Well, you need to figure it out.

- I guess I do

- Can we still be friends?

- I think so

He extended his hand to me and I shook it. Suddenly, Nick appeared.

- I thought you were on the phone with your mum.

- I was.

- You didn't tell me that you were coming to the bar with Simon.

- That's my fault, I crossed paths with her on the way to the beach and decided to invite her for a drink.

- Oh, I see. Meanwhile, I am on the beach waiting for you – Nick wasn't happy at all.

I looked at Simon and he gave me a look like saying: "You need to talk to him."

- Nick, let just take a walk and talk, okay?

- What was all that about? – I asked him as soon as we were far from the rest.

- What do you mean?

- You were jealous that I was with Simon.

- No, I was just worried about you but, you took a long time on the phone and then I found you with Simon on the bar and you never told me. I was waiting for you.

- Okay, sweetie, listen. I know that you were waiting for me and all that, but you are acting like you are my boyfriend and you are not, so let's get that clear.

- I know that I am not your boyfriend, Olivia but that doesn't mean that I don't deserve some respect.

- I always have respected you. I was just taking a drink with a friend, sorry, I didn't tell you, but it happened all of the sudden.

- Alright, lets just forget about it.

- Nick...I need you to tell me if you are...you know, falling in love with me.

Nick stayed quiet for a while

- Nick?

- Are you?

- I asked you first.

- I think so.

- This is a problem. We talked about it, didn't we?

- Yeah, I know, we did but, sometimes, you just can't plan these things, Olivia, maybe you can because you are a rock that cannot feel anything, but I am not.

- I am not a rock, I am very far from being a rock.

- But, you don't feel the same way about me, do you?

- I am going to be honest, I do have feelings for you. You are a great guy, Nick and these past couple of days have been really amazing.

- But, you just want to be friends with me. I get it.

- I feel like the worst person in the world. I feel that I was playing all of you.

- No, it's not your fault, it's not like you made us do anything. Everything I did was because I wanted to and you warned me from the beginning, I just didn't want to listen.

- I think you are right. Feelings are not something you can control you either feel it or you don't. It doesn't have a switch neither when you can turn it on and off any way you want.

- That's right. But, I am going to be fine, don't worry about me.

We went back to the beach after that and had a great day there. It was nighttime, time to go to bed and after what Nick told me today, it felt awkward. We lie in bed side by side no saying a word. That was the first night we didn't have sex.