Chapter 45

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Amanda Pov

Sun starts falling while giving us the hope to see it once again. It was so beautiful yet so encouraging in their own way. I was sat on the bench after the funeral of Emmy. We couldn't able to save her she was dead on spot but somehow I saw something broken inside me also. The watery but yet having so guilty eyes of my father keep reminding me how our one mistake can cause so much trouble and give us the lifetime pain. He has regret and guilt not to do anything on time so do I have regret to choose the same path as them.

Emmy death's make me realize how messed up I was from the beginning till now. I blamed others for my action but it was I who choose such paths. I saw the consequences of being selfish yet I choose to become like that. It was not my fault that my mother couldn't able to hold my hands and keeps blaming their child for her own sadness. She could forgive and able to move on but she chooses not and become cold-hearted. It was my father who could choose to raise Emmy instead of sending her abroad. As much as money can make you buy precious things it will never teach you to become a good person. All I learn to become selfish and yet arrogant.

I loved Maaya from bottom of my heart but yet I start this with my own selfish reason. I choose to break someone heart just for meaningless showoff even though when I know how it felt when someone you love hurt you so badly. I remember how I keep trying to have my parent's attention when I was a child and they keep ignoring me unless they want to show off me to other people. I never gave her a chance to choose me or understand me all I do is to push myself on her. I was selfish when I touch her, I was selfish when I want to have her but I was the most selfish person when I never confess her for my deeds.

Maaya Pov

Few days pass since all this happened and now things getting in control. I couldn't able to talk to Amanda but her face was stuck in my mind when our eyes meet in the funeral for the last time. I don't know what happened but after the funeral, she has vanished like an air. Kate also tries to talk to her but nothing happened all we got to know that she was disturbed. I understand her but the look on her face and how she looks at me that movement was different. It was like she opens her heart for me and offering her soul. There was guilt in her eyes and I am still way too much hurt from her. I expect her to come to me and explain to me or anything but she was just gone.

I was finishing my project in the library and sitting all alone. Well, you can say people now don't use the library at all. There was pin-drop silence in the library, it felt like a silence before a thunder. I was trying to concentrate on my work when I felt someone behind me and I turn shockingly.

"What the hell Amanda? Why you make me scared like this?" I said angrily while putting my hand on my chest to calm myself

She didn't say anything just keep staring at me but not in pervert way but in some another different way which I couldn't exactly explain right now. Before I could say anything else she goes on her knees and burst into tears. I couldn't get angry on her like this not when she looks so vulnerable and devastated. I hugged her tightly and let her cry even when I want to hit her badly but also want to cry in her arms for doing this to me.

"I want to say sorry to you for what I did but it was not enough at all when I make your life so miserable," Amanda said while gazing on the floor and I couldn't say anything to her

"I was not able to come back to you right after that incident because there was nothing I can say in my defense when I treat you so badly. I was selfish and arrogant from the beginning and instead of asking your permission all I do was forcing you," she said while taking a deep breath

"I didn't expect from you to accept me when I was such a shameless person but I just want to apologize for everything I did with you."

"No, it's not like..." I said trying to cut her when she stops me in middle

"No please don't stop me it took way too much time for me to gather so much courage to say all this to you so please let me say all this for once."

"I was forceful to you from the beginning and never let you choose. I planned to use you when I went to your workplace but I couldn't stop thinking about you. I kissed you, I touched you but some part of me was still aware I was playing with you but I couldn't say a word to you."

"Everyday looking at you in that hospital while falling in love with you every single movement was not regretful but keep lying to when claiming that I was in love with you was what I regret. I said to you that I loved you but never ask any decision from you," she said with teary eyes and at that movement, I want to forget everything

"All those bet and game was a damn childish thing I will always regret it but today I won't ask to take me back in your life because I don't deserve this but it will be your choice only because believe me when you woke in that hospital not only you reborn but I also reborn in that movement. I won't say I will never make any mistakes in the future also but I promise to never hide from you. I won't hide my mistakes because I was scared of the consequences but I will say it to make it right."

"So if by any chance you ever able to forgive for my mistakes please do it because even after hundred of mistakes my love was not a game for you," Amanda said while getting up

"I hope one day you able to forgive me," She said while leaving me with all this pain

"Don't you dare to leave me again AMANDA when you know I couldn't stop loving you?" I said angrily

"I love you from always even though you are the most stupid person in this world so I asked you this time with all my senses," I said with a small smile

"Will you give me the honor to be your wedded wife and love me till my last dying breath?" 

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