Give Me Love (One Direction Fan Fiction)

Chapter 12

Tyler’s POV:

Harry and I continued are sexual relationship for the last month, every chance we got we would be together. On the tour bus I would usually just stay in the room I got in the end of the bus.

Other then the times I actually needed to take pictures, but the boys understood that I could only be around them of so long.

The majority of the time, Harry would make up some excuse to stay on this tour bus, because other wise we were all suppose to hang out on the other boys. None of them knew but Niall, and we planned to keep it that way.

Harry and I were just fuck buddy’s, but he got to know me, I told him about the depression, anxiety, and anorexic; but I couldn’t bring myself to tell him about the bulimia or cutting.

Surprisingly Harry has been supportive this whole time, and I have been doing a lot better. I sometimes skip meals, but otherwise I don’t purge after, and I haven’t cut in 2 weeks.

In the last month we celebrated Liam’s birthday, and just a week ago we celebrated Niall’s. The U.S tour was now coming to an end, the last show was in L.A.

After L.A. we went to Canada, there was only 6 shows there. And then we got our first break. Much needed needless to say.

Right now I am alone in my room, on my skyping Devin, we were laughing and talking about when I get back how were going to go out, he was telling me all about his new.. friend.

I miss him so much, it’s been super hard, but Harry and Niall have helped but they’re no Devin. Devin doesn’t like the fact that Harry knows, and he doesn’t like our relationship, but he’s there for me.

“So how is it being around screaming girls every night? “ Devin asked while he was eating ice cream in his bedroom.

“I’ve only actually taken pictures when they’re performing twice. It’s mostly signing, tour bus, before concert and after concert. I’m glad though..” my voice died off to the end.

“Why?! Doesn’t Harry make sex eyes at you, while other girls are screaming about how they want him. Then how you really get him. They don’t want you to doing the nasty on stage.” Devin exclaimed scrapping the bottom of his ice cream carton.

I thought about what Devin said, and a couple things came to mind, like how I actually got to be with Harry while these other girls cried when they got a glimpse of him, and also why they wouldn’t let me take picture during the concert.

Harry can’t be caught giving his cousin sex eyes, I really shouldn’t even be here, I mean, was the only reason I’m here so Harry and I can fuck? Do the other boys know? Does management?

“Uh Ty, you okay? Your facial expression just went from happy, to looking like you’re about to cry.” ‘

Now that I have came to this realization, was I a bother? Did the boys even like me? Am I even here for photography?  

“I’m sorry babe, is it something I said. Just tell me and we can talk.”

I gulped loudly trying to hold back the tears.

“I don’t want to talk.” I whispered. And with that I ended our skype call.

I don’t completely understand anything, like for starters, why am I already crying, I don’t know anything for sure, or why I should even cared. These boys were famous. They’re already set for life.

The only thing that can ruin it is bad publicity. No wonder they didn’t want me to be anywhere in public with them. They probably all know.

I went to text Harry telling him we needed to talk, but first I had text to reply too.

Have you been taking your meds? I love you and if you need anything I’m here for you. Xx

Devin texted me every night reminding me to take my medication for anxiety and depression, I never usually took mine for depression because I felt like I was high, and they’re extremely addictive and easy to overdose on.

Your in L.A today!! I’ll be at the show so we can sit together, and were going out after! Stoked to see you!

The fact that Demi Lovato is texting me, made me want to fan girl, I don’t care that I’m sleeping with Harry Styles or that I share a tour bus with them, but Demi Lovato said she’s excited to see me.

How crazy is that.

I have been, thanks dev, just feeling sick. But im not preggo(; xx

I’ll see you soon then! Cheers!

Then my last text.

We need to talk.

Just then, the bus stopped. My guess is that they’re all coming in this bus, but no. We are in L.A. the bus driver informs me. I change out of my P.J.’S into my ripped black tights, half purple, half white dye dyed high shorts, and a sleeveless white button up top.

I put on a pair of floral wedges and run off of the bus to see the boys. My hair is in a messy bun but it’s falling out so I just let it loose, I wipe the makeup from under my eyes hoping that I still have some one.

“Feels like I haven’t seen you in days! You’ve been hiding out in your room I see.” Liam teases me.

“Just doing my job and photo shopping you all so you look perfect.” I teased back.

“I look fabulous all the time.” Louis exclaimed sounding like a 7 year old.

We all laugh, I take a second to take in my surroundings, were outside of Staples Centre. The boys are making there way into the arena. I run back to the bus to grab my cell phone, my make up and camera.

~~

“Everything is working, you have 2 hours till the show, get some food and rest up.” I hear someone yell and the next thing I know the boys are all back stage questioning me where I want to eat.

I didn’t answer so they decided. I wasn’t to sure where, but we were on our way in the van somewhere.

I sat in the back fiddling my hair and touching up my makeup.

“I don’t understand why you wear that stuff.” Harry whispers to me. He scared me because I didn’t realize he was beside me.

“Because it makes me look better and then I feel better.” I said defending myself.

“You’re already beautiful.” He whispers into my hair. I can feel his breathe, smell is cologne, I want his lips.

I scoot away from him hoping that would fight the temptation, but it didn’t. I turned to Harry.

“We need to talk.” I say trying to change the subject before we get in a fight about my self-esteem issues. That seemed to happen a lot whenever were together.

“Okay, about what love?”

I paused for a moment, not quite to sure how to put my thoughts into words.

You're using me for sex so, I don’t want to be on tour.

I want to be with you, not just fuck you.

“Why am I really here?” I snarled fairly loudly, I know Louis and Niall heard me. They turned they heads to us, Niall raised his eye brow and Louis looked confused.

“What do you mean?” Harry questioned me, quietly so the boys wouldn’t focus on us.

“Am I even here to do my job or to please you?”

Harry bit his lip and looked down. He didn’t have to say anything. I already knew the answer after that.