The Thief and the Barbarian

An Unexpected Turn of Events

As Craig opened his eyes slowly, he put a hand to his head. It was pounding. He groaned as he tried to sit up, but hissed in pain when his side flared, causing him to fall back.

"Agh, fuck..." He groaned.

"Careful. You'll hurt yourself if you move too much." Craig froze as he heard another voice. He quickly sat up, trying not to squeal as his side ignited in pain, and saw the young barbarian sitting near him, a fire in front of them as the boy sharpened a long stick with a knife. The blonde boy looked at Craig in annoyance. "What did I just say?" He growled as he pressed the blunt end of the stick into Craig's chest, making him lay back down again. "You'll ruin the bandages." Craig's mind reeled. Bandages? He brought a hand up to his arm and noticed cloth wrapped tightly around it. The same was done around his torso. "If you're done feeling yourself up, I have dinner prepared." Craig frowned at him as the barbarian stood and walked over. "Here, this will make eating easier." He said and, before Craig knew it, his head and back were being lifted slightly and a rock was placed behind him. Craig could hardly process what was happening around him.

"Uh, what's going on? Why am I not dead? And why are you not currently trying to kill me?" He asked, clearly confused. He'd get up and make a run for it, but his torso wound kept him down. At least for the moment. He knew he wouldn't get far. As far as his questioned went, the barbarian didn't answer. He simply pushed a piece of bark with a cooked fish on it towards the thief.

"Eat." He said simply. Craig eyed it suspiciously.

"It's not...poisoned, is it?"

"Why would I tell you if it was?"

"...Fair point..." The thief grabbed the fish and gave it a good whiff. Nothing off about it so far. He took a small bite. It...was delicious! His eyes widened as he took several more big bites. Whatever the barbarian did to it, he didn't care. It tasted amazing. Cooked just right with some kind of seasoning he couldn't identify. He then took notice of the barbarian giving him a knowing smile, causing him to swallow the food a bit slower and look away with an embarrassed blush. After a few more bites, Craig landed on the conclusion that the fish wasn't sabotaged, and decided to speak again. "So, uh...why are you helping me? After what happened, I figured I'd be dead by now."

"Well, you're not exactly in possession of the stolen goods anymore." He said as he held up the sack.

"My bag!"

"Mine now."

"That's not fair!" Craig then went silent as the barbarian cocked an eyebrow at the hypocrisy. Craig just side and relaxed against the rock. "You never did tell me your name..." He suddenly commented.

"Do I need to?" He asked as he continued sharpening the stick.

"Well, I just figured it's common decency."

"As if you know a whole lot about common decency." The boy sneered. After some silence, the boy sighed and stopped sharpening. "It's...Tweek." He said slowly before resuming his activity. Craig blinked in surprise and looked at him.

"Tweek, huh? That's...an interesting name."

"Yeah, well yours isn't exactly that great either." Craig simply scoffed and looked away. A few minutes of awkward silence passed before a thought crossed Craig's mind.

"Oh, by the way, how did you know I was lying about my name?"

"It was in your eyes. I can tell when someone's lying. Also, the name Feldspar sounds even more stupid than Craig. Not very believable."

"Hey!" Craig whined. "It's my cool thief alias!" He then waved his hand in front of himself flamboyantly. "I'm Feldspar, feared by all and scared of nothing! The greatest thief the land of Zaron has ever known!"

"...Who managed to be shot down by a kid." Tweek smirked. Craig frowned and gave him an unamused look.

"You're really killing my mojo here, man." Tweek rolled his eyes in response.

"Whatever." He replied. Craig's went silent as his eyes lingered on Tweek. This...barbarian boy was strange. Despite his snippy attitude, he was being surprisingly hospitable. Why was he trying to help him? Why did he bandage him up? Feed him? Converse with him? Why was he doing all this after just trying to kill him? "Why are you staring at me?" Tweek suddenly asked, not looking up from his work. From how much he was sharpening that stick, it would cease to exist within the hour. Craig jumped from the question and quickly cleared his throat before responding.

"I, uh...I was just wondering...why you're going through all this trouble for me. I'm sure killing me would be easier." He explained. Tweek smirked at him.

"Oh, it certainly would be, but I'd rather leave that honor to my people." He responded. Craig blinked in surprise.

"H-huh?" Tweek chuckled at his cluelessness.

"What, you didn't think stealing from barbarians would go without consequence, did you?" He asked, smirking wider.

"But...but all this..." Craig motioned to all the bandages and the half-eaten fish. Tweek rolled his eyes.

"If you hadn't noticed, you're in no condition to travel, and it's several miles back to the barbarian encampment. And because your horse abandoned you when you fell off, we're walking. So, I need you nice and healthy if you're going to make it back alive." Craig didn't know what to say. He was speechless. Here he thought the barbarian was being nice to him, but really, he was keeping him alive so his people could kill him. His anger overtook him suddenly, and he tried to reach for his knife, only to realize it was missing.

"M-my kni-" Craig went silent as he realized the knife Tweek had been using to sharpen the stick all along had been his. Tweek gave Craig an annoyed look before standing up and walking over, standing over him menacingly as he pointing the knife at his chest.

"And now you know why you never steal from a barbarian." Craig held up his hands in a similar fashion to their first encounter.

"Dude, again, I only took a few things...You are seriously getting worked up over nothing! Plus, you have the stuff back now, why not just take it and be on your way? No one has to die."

"That's where you're wrong, Craig. It's not about the stuff. It's about the principle. If we let one thief go so he can rattle on about how he managed to steal from the barbarians, what's to stop another thief from trying? Or an opposing faction, like ones led by the fat magic bender? It makes us look weak. We need to make an example of you to show others what happens when you mess with the barbarians." He pulled the knife away and turned around. "So, no, I can't let you go. Not only will you be made an example of, but I will get the highest of praise, and maybe everyone will start taking me seriously. I'll finally earn some damn respect around he-" Tweek was interrupted as a rock suddenly collided with the back of his head. He fell forward, the thief standing over him, clutching his side and heaving in pain.

"Not today, fucker..."