chaotic perfection

Chapter six

8 years ago.

It's a typical Saturday night. Stark and I are out after a movie with our best friends Stacy and George. We've been the foursome for a few years now. We went to every movie premier that was horror, every school event, all the dances together. Stacy and George we're a couple but Stark and I were just best friends. I had my own boyfriend at the time. His name was Jacob Saltzman. A dreamy 6'4 blonde with the most gorgeous blue eyes you'd ever seen. We met at a birthday party for some girl at the roller rink when we were 15. We had a nice time making fun of all the kids who fell, had pizza and talked about what our plans were for high school and on. He wanted to be a biologist, I thought that was so sweet.
  Jacob met up with us after the movie, he hates horror. We go to our local favourite, Beth's, open 24/7. Sitting at the booth we all colour as we wait for our orders and discuss the movie while Jacobs arm is around me. We've been dating a year now and each time I see him I feel so comfortable.
  Stark never really had a girlfriend he just had.. "friends" girls he would see for a while and dispose of. But I knew the real him and supported his actual life decisions of wanting to pursue writing.
  "My favourite scene was when the girl completely busted her ass on the tree root like we all saw coming, and that pathetic scream!" He laughs at the bad acting. We all join in except Jacob who is pretty quiet when he's around. They don't like each other much, especially since I'm always around him and Jacob is always getting on Starks nerves with his "perfectness" as he says. Stark says it's all fake and it'll falter but, I never believed him.
   After the meal we all head out to figure out if we wanna continue on the night or if we want to head home.
"It's only 9 o'clock guys! It's Saturday let's go to the beach or the park! Something!" Stacy whines as she grabs onto George's waist to lean into him.
  "I second that I'd like to continue the partyyy" George adds. We all roll our eyes. Of course he's going to agree with her. If he didn't she would complain like no ones business.
  "I'm fine with it if you guys are" Stark replies and looks at Jacob and me.
   Jacob looks down at me and grabs my hand before he states "if you guys don't mind I'd like to take Roxy for a little while. We can meet up with you a bit later"
  Starks eyes immediately go to me with a look of unease and protectiveness. His green eyes always so bright even in the darkness. "I don't think that's a good idea Rox" he states, his mouth forming into a flat line.
  "I'll be fine, I'm ok with that" I reply looking at stark then to Jacob. I smile up at him as he starts to say his goodbyes and walk me to his car. I'm not sure what he has planned but Stark seems very unhappy with it all. He must have heard something from someone. I get into Jacobs car and immediately look at Stark and mouth "I'll call you later"
  Jacob starts his Toyota with ease and drives into the night. We have a special spot we usually go to that only a few of us know about and that's where it seems we're going. Jacobs always been a gentleman, he never hugs for too long, always asks me how my day was and he seems to genuinely care about my interests in becoming a therapist.
   We pull into the familiar scene and get out of the car. We have to walk a small trail to get to the edge in order to see the whole city. This look out has always taken my breath away every single time. We set up our usual blankets and I lean into him as we sit down to overlook.
   "Roxy do you realize what day it is today?" He asks with nervousness. Unusual for Jacob.
  "Uhmmm it's Saturday February 17th?" I reply semi sarcastically. I'm not sure if there was an important date I was supposed to remember...
   "Yes and it's also the anniversary of the first day I met you" he says sweetly kissing the top of my head. "I figured I'd be the one to remember because it's kind of corny but I wanted to spend some time with you today." His cheeks turn slightly pink and he talks.
  "Awhh Jacob, that's so sweet. That's so crazy we met two years ago! And it took you almost six months to convince me to date you " I giggle up at him as he relaxes at my words.
  "Yeah I remember that part well. Especially the me having to get passed Stark to get your attention part" with a trace of bitterness he looks out at the scenery of the illuminated buildings below us.
  "You didn't have to get past Stark, he's just.. protective of me." I smile at the thought of my best friend.
  "Yeah in a kind of messed up way. It's like he's in love with you and only wants you for himself." Jacob snaps. He doesn't it often but whenever Stark is discussed, it sure seems to be his trigger. 
  "That is not true. We've grown up together that's all. He's like an older brother to me." I reply grabbing Jacobs chin to look at me. "You're my boyfriend he's my best friend why can't you guys just get along." I pout at him.
  Jacob sighs and takes my hand in his before closing his eyes and replying "I just think that it's a bit unhealthy. Of course I know that you're only mine and not his."
  I tense at his words. I'm.. his? "Im yours? Like some property?" I snap and pull away from him.
  "That's not what I meant, babe!" He exclaims trying to grab my hand back. He frowns and looks down."I just mean that you're my girlfriend and not his and I shouldn't worry about that at all. I know you love me and not him." He tried to reason. I know those words shouldn't bother me so much but they do.. he knows my independence is something I'm really proud of and it may be over the top to be mad at those terms. Normal couples use it all the time right?
  "I'm sorry I shouldn't have over reacted." I sigh and sit down next to him once again. "Stark and I were raised together. His mom practically raised me until my dad showed up. You know all that of course he and I are close but we're not romantic." I groan at having to say this for the fiftieth time.
  He looks down at me with something new in his eyes that I've never seen before. He kisses me with roughness, not the usual gentle Jacob that I'm used to. I'm surprised but I kiss him back. He begins to get on top of me before I know what's happening. I'm not used to this aggressive side at all but I'm not sure if I dislike it or not. He begins to kiss down my neck before trying to remove my shirt, I life my arms to help him and he goes back to my mouth. His fingers trail across my arms then down to the tops of my breasts. He lets out a soft groan and I can feel him beginning to harden against my leg. But it's all snapped back to reality when I hear the familiar sound of a car driving up and the crunching of branches. Jacob and I quickly find my shirt and grab our stuff before hiding. No one is supposed to know about this but us and our friends, and this car didn't sound anything like George's.
A man and a woman come into the clearing whispering loudly. You can hear that they're both intoxicated as they stumble around. I hear a familiar voice. It's my fathers. And the woman begins to speak explaining why I know her. It's Starks step mother.
I gasp at the scene unfolding of the man I haven't seen, who has always had a drinking problem, and the woman who had been in Starks life since he was 2. Who was a second mom to him, he finally admitted that he had two moms 4 years ago. He hated that his parents had split up.
Before I know it my legs have gotten up and I'm running out into the clearing yelling. "Why the fuck are you with him Stephanie?! That's not your fiancé" I yell as the tears begin to form from anger, my throat beginning to tighten as I fight them off. "And you, Scott. Why the fuck are you here. Drinking! Again!" I yell even louder. Jacob has emerged from the clearing and is trying to pull me back a little and calm me down. "Roxy, come on this isn't the place or time they're both drunk." He tries.
"No you don't get to just let them off for this. This is sick."
"Roxy please this isn't what you think. We're in love!" Scott exclaims
"In love?! THATS MY BEST FRIENDS STEP MOM" I scream out at him before pushing him. "And you! How fucking dare you! You are destroying and already broken family! How could you do that to Nathan? He is your husband! He never wanted to marry and yet here you came in and wooed him" I can't hold back the tears any longer. "How long have you two been sneaking around like this" I whisper into the silence.
"It's only been a couple months I promise. I don't know how it happened. But I do love him and I know this is all messy and it's going to be hard for all of us but I just can't help it" she exclaims to me.
"You guys need to leave. And stop fucking drinking you piece of shit. This is exactly why mom left you." I say before walking off. Jacob is behind me silent as can be. I punch the nearest tree and scream out my anger. Jacob tried to pull me back but it's no use. Once I'm on the roll I can't seem to stop. I've always had anger issues since I was kid because of my life at the time.
Once I'm done I begin walking again, my chest heaving up and down. Jacob tries to reason with me.
"Maybe we should get you home so you can get those cleaned up. I hate when you get this way"
"Take me to Stark." Is all I say.
He looks defeated but he knods his head. Silently we both get into his car and he drives me to the Mukilteo  beach. It's the group favourite for fires and swinging. It's colder right now so we know that no one will be there to interrupt us.
    Driving up he parks near the pits. I get out and immediately run as soon as I see the black head of hair, black shirt and black pants. I know I'm still crying and he's going to be worried sick but I have to tell him.
  "Roxy! You guys made it!" Stacy exclaims happily in George's lap. They're sitting on a log with the fire glowing brightly.
  "Rox, what's wrong?" The eyes I have always adored are piercing into me. I can't seem to breathe only cry. He rests my head into his chest and gently puts the strand of hair that always falls into my face before sitting me down on the log and walking to Jacob. "What the fuck did you do to her?" He yells sternly.
  "I didn't do anything man I swear! It's not me it's.." he trails off "Id rather her told you, it's not my place, Stark."
  His breathing seems to steady and his fists unclench on his side.
"Rox what happened. Are you ok?" He's squatting down looking up at me at the edge of the log.
  I clear my throat and nod. "It's Stephanie... and my father.." immediately his eyes widen, his fists clench again. He immediately punches the log. He's not stupid he knew something was going on but he dismissed it because he was finally having a normal, steady family life. His mom Karen, was doing better after the divorce and she seemed happy and busy with her shop. His dad Rupert, had finally met and married a woman and was happy as can be in his own home. His sister Amelia was two years older than us and was never really around due to her college boyfriend Brad. But he never seemed to mind. His life was finally steady. And within two seconds I took that all away from him.
  I try my best to gently run my fingers through his hair to ease him. He never seemed to let anyone calm him down, only me. I'm the only one who knew how. His breathing was heavy as he puts his hands down to his side. I can see the anger still steady but he's starting to regulate into steady breathing . Stacy and George are in shock on the other side.
"Stark please look at me?" I whisper and try and put my fingers under his chin. He pulls away from me and I drop my hand back to my side.
Jacob tells us he's gonna head out but he'll call me later.
"Stark, this doesn't change anything. You still have your dad and your mom, Amelia and me. We aren't going anywhere." I say with my comforting voice as I gently run my fingers through his hair again.
"But that's just it isn't it? You'll leave too. You and your perfect little boyfriend. You've seen how often Amelia is around it's not gonna be long before that's you too." He yells. Standing up he looks at the water. "I don't want you to have the luxury to walk away from me too. I'll take that one for myself." With that he leaves to walk away from us.
A year passed and he stayed true to his word. He avoided me, made fun of me even in the halls for dressing in my clothes. He got into fights constantly before he finally got expelled for breaking out English teacher Mr.Browns, nose. He would pick arguments with Karen and me if I was ever over at the house. After that he was shipped off to his dads across the country where he had moved to be away from everything. His mom just couldn't handle it anymore.