Scarred ✔️

02 | scarred feelings

Chapter Two

I wake up in a huge room; it's been so long since I've seen the insides of a room. I sit down and realize that my body doesn't hurt as much. My head, on the other hand, feels like it's about to explode.

I lean against the pillows and take the time to analyse the room I am in. The room is painted off white in colour; with a walk-in closet is at the far end. One side of the wall is completely made of glass and I look at the pool outside in awe.
 
Then the reality hits me hard.
 
What next? I question myself. Did Zach bring me here out of pity? Or was it our past?
 
A knock startles me.
 
"Miss Sallow, Mr Kane has asked for your presence," a small voice calls out. I suddenly feel nervous about being around him. I limp to the door and open it.
 
"I don't mean to sound rude but... Miss Sallow... I think you should shower first," the girl says with wide eyes, looking at me up and down. My cheeks burn in embarrassment.
 
Dressed in a typical maid outfit, the girl doesn't look a day over seventeen. Her eyes are hazel in colour and her blonde hair is neatly pulled into a ponytail.
 
She reminds me of my own teenage years; the best years of my life. Good times fly fast, don't they? I nod my head and close the door in her face, still embarrassed.
 
I limp to the bathroom and don't look at the mirror for the fear of looking at a broken girl, who looks like a ghost, staring back at me.
 
I take a little longer in the shower than I had to. I wrap a towel around me and one around my long brown hair. I then limp outside and walk into the closet. I pick out a simple pair of red underwear and that again, are my size.
 
I also pick out a white t-shirt and black sweatpants, wondering who owns these clothes. It couldn't be Zach's girlfriend, could it? His wife, perhaps?
 
And while I know it's been seven years since Zach and me, jealousy wrecks me.

You are over him.
 
Once I get changed, I limp outside my room and the moment I step outside, I know I am going to be lost. I walk straight, not knowing where to go. There are so many doors. I feel anxious, what if I get lost and no one comes to my rescue?
 
That was a stupid thought. I hadn't hurt my head, had I?
 
"Ellen," I hear Zach's voice and I freeze. Not because he is there but because he used my name and not the nickname he used to call me by. It feels so foreign. I never liked it when anyone, especially him, used my full name.
 
It makes me sound like an old woman.
 
I turn around anyway, trying my best to keep my expression blank. I take in his appearance. He has changed into a white t-shirt and black sweatpants, same as mine and I have to say, he looks good in casual attire.
 
It's weird how we are wearing the same outfit. He doesn't bother looking at me and turns around after mumbling a small 'follow me'. Again, that hurt, but I follow him nonetheless.
 
I follow him to God-knows-where and try to keep up with his fast pace which was really difficult because- a) I had shorter legs and b) those legs were injured, thanks to him.
 
My stomach growls lowly and I am thankful for the distance between us, Zach doesn't hear it. I had stayed hungry for days, a few hours won't hurt. Right?
 
"Zach, baby," a high pitched voice startles me.
 
"Scarlet," Zach says in surprise. I look at the woman who attacks Zach in a hug. She looks like the exact replica of a Barbie- huge blue eyes, a narrow nose, full lips, tan skin, curly blonde hair. She is attractive, I will give her that.
 
What makes my heart constrict though is how Zach hugs her back. I try to calm my heart down and ignore the ache. He deserves a pretty woman like her. Not a homeless, scarred, mute, unattractive-
 
"Who is she?" The girl, Scarlet, screeches when her eyes fall at me.
 
"No one important," Zach waves me off. I bite my lips and look at the floor. No one important, I let that sink in.
 
"Don't tell me it's one of your charity cases," Scarlet yells. That does it. Ignoring the pain on my leg, I walk away-as silently as I can-in the opposite direction to where we were going. I take random turns and keep walking away.
 
Few angry tears roll down my cheek. Charity case, huh? I might not be rich and all but I had self-respect. I'd rather live on the streets than live in a mansion, being disrespected like that.
 
I sigh in relief when I see a staircase, I walk down. Pain shoots through my right knee but I don't stop. I beam in happiness when a huge door comes into view. I struggle to open it but I am successful. I walk outside the door.
 
The girl from before, the maid, comes after me but I give her a look that says 'back off'. She does back off.
 
Streets, back I come.
 
I bite my lips to swallow the sob building inside me. I was an idiot to think Zach cared. He just pities me. He sees me as a 'charity case'.
 
"Ella, stop," I hear his thunderous voice. I start walking quickly, not bothering to turn around. However, my foot gets stuck in something and I fall down. Hard.
 
I groan in pain and sobs wreck my body. What did I do to deserve this? Zach hurries to me and kneels, muttering profanities under his breath. He lifts me by my waist.
 
"Shh, Ella. Breathe," he tries to calm me down. I try to get out of his arms, it hurts so much. My heart hurts so much.
 
"Ella, it's okay. Stop crying."

I don't. I can't.

"Ella, please. Where does it hurt?"
 
My heart.
 
I continue to cry silently. Zach sighs before lifting me bridal style and taking me inside. I again try to get out of his hold. I don't want to go inside. Before I know it, I am sobbing uncontrollably.
 
I am nobody's charity case.
 
"Shh, it's okay. Ella," he groans when I shake as sobs wreck my body. He sits down somewhere and holds me against him, on his lap. He runs his hand on my back and says nothing.
 
I calm down after a while. The side of my head is on his chest and his calm heartbeat makes me feel at home. His comforting hand on my back has me sighing softly. He patiently holds me on his lap. I missed this. I missed everything about him.

Unfortunately, I am not as important to him. But, after breaking his heart like I did, it is understandable for him to find me unimportant. I think I am going crazy.

He checks my body for new injuries. There are none.
 
"Why won't you talk to me, Ella?" he asks in a small voice and I stiffen in his lap.
 
"Is it because of what happened between us?" he pushes.
 
I remain quiet on his lap. He really thinks I am not talking to him while in reality I'm dying to. My brain won't let me.
 
"If that is the reason then you should know, I have already forgiven you."
 
Fresh tears well up in my eyes. How can he forgive me? Why is he being so sweet? Why is he always so sweet?
 
My broken heart again breaks into a million pieces when I realize the feelings I had buried were again returning, knowing that we would have no future.
 
Zach wipes a hot tear that rolls down my eyes.
 
"What the fuck?" Barbie aka Scarlet shows up again and I spring away from him. Zach sighs.
 
He really did move on, huh. I wipe my remaining tears. One thing that I know is that I am not going to stay here.
 
"Scarlet, I asked you to leave," he sighs.

"And Ellen, I have a proposition for you. Let's talk about it?" he asks, looking directly at my eye. His eyes are hopeful and almost pleading. For a second, I think about walking outside that door, but I am curious about the 'proposition'.
 
I find myself nodding. He gives me a small smile and I think his beautiful green eyes twinkle for a moment.
 
"Great, follow me," he says and starts walking, completely ignoring Barbie's presence. I feel Scarlet's glare on me as I follow Zach back to the staircase, helplessly limping. My knees hurt even more.
 
"Drama Queen," Scarlet mutters under her breath. I roll my eyes. Zach deserves someone better than this stupid Barbie.