Fighting for Life | ✓

1 | I've got a company

I woke up at my alarm going off and as an instinct, my hand shot to turn it off. I laid awake at 4 four in the morning doing nothing but staring at the view my window offered. 

After a while, I forced myself to get out of the comfort of the bed. I walked to the bathroom and splashed cold water on my face. The sudden impact of cold water on my face startled me, made my breath hitch. For a moment, I couldn't breathe and my chest felt too heavy. 

When I got used to the cold, I splashed the cold water on my face again, and that time, I didn't feel anything. I brushed my teeth and freshened up, giving myself the strength and energy to get through another day.

That early in the morning, everyone was sleeping. My parents, aunt, and uncle, and my cousin, all were sleeping. Which meant I could do whatever I want without anyone around to tell me what to do, to judge me, to scold me.

So I did what I always did in the morning. I changed into some workout attire: a pair of black shorts and a black sports bra. Yet, I remembered to throw on a white tee.

Chances are very slim, but in case my mom or aunt caught me in just a pair of shorts and a sports bra, I'm dead. Better be safe than sorry.

Anyway, this early in the morning, no one would be out to see me, meaning I could walk around naked and not be afraid of anyone seeing me.

I put on my running shoes, grabbed my phone, connected my AirPods, and got out of the house. As soon as I stepped outside, the cool morning breeze hit my face.

It felt good, to be honest. The silence, the cold wind, even the faint rays of the sun hitting the earth. Not that typical sunrise with warm orange rays, but the colorless ones you see in the middle of the night.

After all, four in the morning is the middle of the night.

I stretched a little on the porch, warm my muscles, then started jogging down the street.

Music blasted in my ears as I got lost in it like the little escape it is of mine. And I love music. My legs were burning from the running, my lungs were working so hard to provide my body oxygen that it needed.

But I kept going.

I didn't stop. Couldn't.

If it doesn't burn, I'm not working hard enough. If I'm not scared, I'm not dreaming big enough. 

My whole body was on fire. It was too hot. And Miami's warm weather wasn't helping either. 

I slow down a little to take off my tee and wrap it around my waist.

Soon, I reached this calisthenics park where I workout a little every morning. But when I reached there, I was surprised to see someone there already. He was young, probably of my age. 

From what I could see, he has maybe, black hair, gold tanned skin, and a very toned body. I wouldn't say he was packed with muscles. He had muscles, yes. Just perfectly placed where needed.

I checked the time, and as expected, it was four-thirty. I have one hour to do the drills and thirty minutes to get back home before anyone realizes I'm not home.

Just. Great.

I snorted which earned me that guy's attention. His head snapped towards me, his face showing surprise. But then, he nodded at me. I nodded back at his greeting before he went back to whatever he was doing.

As soon as I started working on my balance and spins on the bar, I forgot about the guy. I got lost in my world, my body burning from the intense activity.

A reminder on my phone reminded me that it was five-thirty already. Time to go back. I grabbed my tee from where I put it before working on the bars, used it to wipe the sweat from my face and body, then wrapped it around my waist.

I saw the boy wrapping up too, guess he, also, was going back. 

"Have a nice day," I called out as I strolled out of the park.

"You too," 

The way back home was the same. My legs and lungs burned, and yet I didn't stop for them to cool down a little.

When I got back to the house, I showered and got ready for the day. I checked my school bag to make sure I had everything I needed for the day. 

The house was still sleeping when I got to the kitchen. I poured myself a cup of coffee and made a bowl of salad to calm my growling stomach.

The school was the same old. No one talked to me. No one paid attention to me, but, I paid attention to everyone. I mean, I observed everything.

I paid attention to every word the teacher said in each class, took notes, and worked.

Then came lunchtime. I sat alone at the table in one corner of the canteen. I don't bother anyone, and no one bothers me.

That was basically my life. I didn't have any friends. I wanted, no needed friends soo badly. I needed someone to talk to, to vent my problems to someone. But there was no one I trust. Whoever I talked to, either doesn't understand me or gets bored with me. Or simply just thinks that I am a pathetic girl with no life or an attention whore. So, I preferred my company

The next three hours in the school, passed the same way.

I got home, greet my mother and aunt. Yes. We all lived together. Me, my parents, my aunt—my mother's sister, her husband—my uncle and my cousin. Their son. Who's two years older than me.

I served myself some ravioli that my aunt or my mother prepared and ate in silence while the ladies, I mean my mother and aunt, watch some show on the TV.

My aunt and mum are housewives. They believe that if their husbands earn enough to provide for them, they don't need to work. And, even if they thought of working, dad and uncle wouldn't have let them. Even if it came to living off to the streets.

My uncle and dad are the owners of Indie Tech, it's an application and game developer company. And it's a pretty successful one. So my family is well off economically. And me too, as long as I'm on good terms/living with them. My uncle and dad believe that their wives shouldn't work at all because they are capable of providing them a roof. 

I don't understand how my mother and aunt do it. I know I wouldn't be able to live without working or going out. Like, how would I keep myself occupied? A little free time takes my head to places I don't want to go. It makes me think about things I don't want to think. 

Getting bored makes me sad, very sad. And it makes me wanna hate my family. So I avoid getting bored.

My afternoon consists of me doing all of my homework and a little extra to get ahead in each class to keep up my grades.

Later around five PM, I go running again. To workout. My mother doesn't know that I sneak out to start my day.

I got ready and went downstairs to find mother sleeping and aunt watching something on her phone.

"I'm going out, Aunt Hema," I whispered, not wanting to disturb my mother.

"Be back before 7. Or else you won't be going out ever again," She whispered bitter-sweetly.

"Yes, aunt" I muttered

So that was my life. My family constantly controlled me. God help me if I will ever have a chance to live a simple teenage life. 

* * *

life's not all rainbows and sunshine. we all got problems.

edited 11/04/2021