The Darkness Within

Chapter 1 - The very start

Hi! This one is written by Rachel!

Chapter 1 - The Very Start

My life has been cursed ever since 1991, the year I was born. My mother gave birth to me at the local hospital – the Royal Surrey, in Guildford. It was next to her that one of my closest friends was born. She was born about two hours before me, but her mother died afterwards. My mum said that the baby, my friend, just looked at her mother’s body and smiled and giggled the way babies do. Smiled and giggled as if the thought of death pleased her. Her father was there and he cried for ages and named the child Ciarra, meaning dark.

My birth wasn’t as dramatic. I was born while my mother screamed in pain and begged for it to end. I came out crying, probably crying because I wanted everything to end too. Wanted it to end instead of growing up in a world of love, hate, pain, death and despair. Well that’s what I hope I was crying for because I am NOT a cry baby.

Anyway, they named me Zoey, meaning life. Named my life, while death had just been in the room, and sorrow and loss still hung in the air. Life, while hundreds of people at that very second died. While people cried at their loss and wished they could choose death over life. Wished they were never born, because in life, we are sad and it’s so very hard to find true happiness. People can pretend their happy but inside they’re breaking apart and they feel that if they go on, their heart will shatter into a million tiny pieces. But only their heart. Their soul will live on and suffer from more pain and sorrow. It will see so much and love and loose so many things that in the end it is afraid to love, because it doesn’t want to lose again. Be afraid to be happy because it doesn’t want to suffer from despair again. Afraid to hope because it doesn’t want to be let down ever again. This is how I have felt and what I have known and been afraid of for as long as I can remember. I told people this, but they used to shun me when I was a kid – shunned me because of what I felt about life. I could only find one good thing in that life. And it was the fact that I wasn’t alone – Ciarra felt the same way. She stood by me and for that I am eternally grateful. Through life, as I was growing up, I saw that everyone felt like me, but it’s only the strongest and best people that show it and because I was one of those that show it, my friendship bonds with others like me is one of

the strongest types there is.

In my life I don’t worry about anything. I just get on and wait till the end comes. And when it comes, I’ll welcome death, and with lots of eagerness and willingness I will go.

But you see, that’s not the only reason why people shun me, you see, I’m a freak. There are moments in my life that I don’t remember. I try and look back on those moments and try to find out what I did on those days, but I can’t all I see is blackness and all I smell is blood, all I hear is silence and all I know is death. My story begins with the ending, because I only found out about everything at the end. Life’s unfair in that way, it’s like a horror book or criminal story – you only find out who did it at the end, and on the way you’re guessing like mad to find out who the real murderer is. You think you’ve got it, but then that person is murdered...