All Of Me

Chapter 4

---------Imediate continuation from park scene ---------

        Zayn just kind of stared at me for a minute. When he finally spoke I felt a knot forming in my stomache. "It's been so long since someone has made me and what I am feeling their focus, like right now I can feel that all of your attention is directed toward me and you genuinely care about what I am saying and not because of who I am in the public eye, not for what you might be able to get out of me if you do. You aren't hyperventalating, screaming, or crying your eyes out because we're sat next to eachother, you are looking at me the way you would look at any of your other guy friends that are in need of a 'heart-to-heart'. I guess that's what I'm upset about, being here and being able to just chill in public, at a park and with no worries at the moment. I miss being able to do this everyday, I mean I love what I do and everything this whole expirience has brought me, like meeting you, but I want to be just Zayn again, not this untouchable fame has made me out to be, and I want to have an actual private life again. I know that once we leave here it's back to screaming pre-pubecent girls and blinding flashes and tabloid headlines that have no truth in them whatsoever, and if I'm being completely honest, I'm not ready for it."

        "Oh sweety, come here," I stretch my arms out to him for a hug which he quite litterally falls into, he just lays in my lap and without thinking I start combing my fingers through his hair while looking down at him. "I know that being in the spotlight has to be really hard on you, and that its rough not being able to have any sort of privacy but this is the path you're on and we're just going to have to find a way to make it easier for you. And you wouldn't be where you are today if it weren't for those girls, don't forget that. I understand you're frustrated because they only love you for who they think you are and that yes they get a lot too excited when you so much as take a breath, but trust me, all girls have at least one person they are like that for, granted quite a few are at much lesser scales of excitement, but nonetheless, you are the guy that they are looking to as a role model and as to how they should think it is acceptable to be treated by a man because of how you treat them. I know it sounds complicated, and it is, but for as long as you are in this buisness and maybe for a while after you get out, you are going to be in the hot seat and you have no control over that, but what you do have control over is how you look at it, how you act, speak, live, you have to set the example, raise the standard. You are going to be watched constantly and no matter how much good you do, the tabloids are going to have field days when you make the tiniest of mistakes, so make the right mistakes. This is your life and you happen to be sharing it with the world, but don't let that stop you from being happy ok? And while you're here with me, you can forget about all of that and just be Zayn."

        "How is it that you telling me to basically just suck it up and get over it can make me feel so much better?" I chuckled at his question, a bit relieved at the lighthearted but still completely serious inquiry.

        "It's because for once it was all layed out in front of you, what to expect and what all of it means for you but also I told you indirectly that you didn't have to go through it alone. It's all in the presentation," he just rolled his eyes at that. 

        I felt a buzz in my pocket right before the chorus of Amnesia by none other than 5SOS started blasting from my phone, the one time I didn't have it on silent and I am with not only the people that sing the song but also the ones that will tease me for having that as my ringtone. I pull it out quickly hoping no one has heard it, too late, I see Luke grinning at me like the cheshire cat, I shoot him a glare and click the answer button. "Yeah?"

        "Why do you insist on answering your phone like that?" My mom.

        "Sorry ma, what didja need?"