Writer's block is something... Dancer's block is something else.
Hyunjin started at himself in the mirror as he tried new moves, but none of them seemed to please him. It was weird, as everything looked perfect in his head...
It was frustrating, because he refused to believe that his new dance was not good.
He tried again and again, making efforts to correct his posture and gestures, even changing small details to look better, but he would never stop. He would never be satisfied.
He looked at himself, once again, and noticed how tired he looked, with dark circles under his eyes, messy hair and flopped shoulders. To make the picture perfect, he was also sweaty from practicing.
He looked away, disgusted at himself. How could he even let himself look like that? What would his fans think of him?
Sometimes, he doubted himself. The voices of his trainee "friends" invaded his head, repeating over and over again how talentless he was and how he only managed to come this far because of his pretty face.
Now, if stays would see him look so terrible, wouldn't they "cancel" him? He could already see the comments flowing, each one of them complaining about Hyunjin as a person, visual, rapper, idol, everything. It wasn't a pleasant thing to imagine, and his heart beat accelerating only proved it.
He could only hear them, the ones whom he called jealous because they didn't get as far as he did, but right now he could only think of them as right.
His dancing was a flop, his looks were becoming worse and his rapping? He knew he needed lots of improvement, considering himself the weakest rapper out of the rap line.
Was he overthinking again? Maybe. But did that stop him? Not at all. It only made him think more, judge himself more because he wasn't doing anything to get better. He was only standing there, in the middle of the practice room, tears threatening to fall from eyes. How pathetic.
But then, he felt a warm presence behind him. Two arms wrapped themselves around his waist, holding him tight, and a head rested on his back offering him comfort.
Hyunjin didn't know who it was, even if he had a guess, but he didn't care. He just closed his eyes and leaned into the person as much as he could without falling over the other.
"You know, you're amazing" a soft voice echoed in the silent room, bringing a welcomed warmth into it.
Hyunjin knew exactly who it was now. There could only be one person with such a soothing, deep voice.
"Am I really, Lix?" he replied with an honest question, knowing it was no use hiding it from him. "Lately, I've just felt like I can't do anything right"
The brunette felt him tighten the hug, to the point where he was having a little difficulty breathing, but it wasn't much so he let it slide. The gesture was well appreciated, anyway.
"Everybody has bad days, or weeks, you know" Fekix started. "Just because you're having some doesn't mean you can bring yourself down like this." He shook his head a little, as if to clarify that it's something Hyunjin shouldn't do, then giggled. "You guys didn't let me do that when I first came here, so I'm not going to let you diss yourself now either"
Somehow, his words brought a small smile to the taller's face. He remembered the times when the Australian really struggled with Korean and could barely talk with them. He was a pretty reserved guy back then, but it didn't take him long to open up about his problems. He remembered how they would all play children games to help him learn more and how they always assured him that he wasn't a burden and that they were having fun.
"You're laughing now? What's up?" The aussie's voice brought Hyunjin back to reality. He was, indeed, laughing. The boy gently removed the other's hands from his waist and turned around to face him. Maybe it was just him, but it felt like he had the biggest idiotic grin ever. Well, until Felix outmatched it with his own.
"Why are you grinning?" the brunette asked, even though he had the same expression as him.
"No idea, but you're also grinning so I shall keep the atmosphere going" he replied and the other made an inhuman noise in his head. No, wait. He actually squealed out loud.
"What was that, you possessed?" the younger started laughing, trying to imitate his weird reaction.
Hyunjin closed his eyes, waited for a second, then dramatically opened them, falling to the ground then getting up and spinning around until he hit his head on the mirror. He huffed at the impact and slid on the ground, pouting.
Felix was staring at him the whole time, an amused smile on his face.
"I don't know what that just was, but good job. You looked like a chaotic noodle and you pulled it off" he chuckled and clapped, as if Hyunjin had just performed on stage.
The latter nodded and thought back to when he was by himself, drowning in negativity. Then, he looked at the sunshine right in front of him and felt all warm and fuzzy, as if every bad thought was pushed away.
Before he knew it, Felix had also dropped on the ground, resting his head on his shoulder.
"You should treasure yourself, Jinnie" the boy sighed. "You're amazing at what you do. Your dancing skills are insane, your rap is so calm but so captivating and flowing, and of course your face is a piece of art. On stage, you're full of charisma and all your fans drop dead. I mean, just look at how much you've improved in so little time. You're on the good track, and we're here with you forever. We're Stray Kids, and to quote myself because yes I'm that original, we're nine or none and we're gonna cross the finish line" he smiled and looked at the other.
Hyunjin returned the action. "Who knew you could be so motivational"
Felix giggled and shrugged, getting up. "I know I didn't, but guess I got kind of triggered" he shook his head and held out his hand for the other to take. "Now, I've heard you've got stuck on a choreo. Want some help?"
The brunette grinned and took his hand with no hesitation, letting himself be pulled up.
"Who am I to say no?"
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**not proofread yet**
