Not Without You {A Peterick Oneshot}

patrick finally makes it back to the apartment.

he turns the key and opens the door to depression.

as he walks through the house, remembering everything pete and him had created in that house.

the couch where they would cuddle and watch movies, occasionally make love.

the kitchen where pete would make him coffee every morning, tea every night.

he opened the fridge and saw the spoiled milk that was good milk the last time he had roamed these floors

he had been living with joe since the incident.

he walked into the bedroom and collapsed to the floor, remembering a fight pete and him had gotten into

"Pat!" pete excitingly ran in holding a yellow package in his hand

"pete, I've told you before, please don't call me pat." patrick was sitting on the bed, legs crossed with his laptop sitting on his lap

"you're such a fuddy duddy! come on, we're 20, work doesn't matter!" Pete closed the laptop

"Pete what the fuck?!" patrick raised his voice, "I've been working on that essay for a week!"

"not important once you see what I have here!" he bounced onto the bed with a huge smile laid onto his face

patrick sighed and placed his elbows on the laptop, resting his head between his hands, "what pete, what could possibly be more important than my essay on World War One?"

"well I'm not gonna show you if you're gonna be bitter."

"bitter?! of course I'm fucking bitter! I know you have this dream of Fall Out Boy actually going somewhere, but it's not, pete. okay? it's not. so while you chase your music fantasy, I'm gonna stick to actually learning something."

Pete looked like a scolded puppy, running his fingers along the crease of the package. the slightest nudge and he could open it, but he didn't.

"I'm sorry, trick.." he stood up, all the excitement gone from his voice, "I'll stop bothering you with my music fantasy." he walked out of the room

Patrick snapped himself back to reality.

he was cuddled around himself, sobbing quite violently

he's thinking maybe he should've let joe and Andy come with him, but he's sick of crying in front of them

he got up the strength to sit on the bed, where he remembered waking up with pete

*crunch* *crunch*

Patrick sleepily rubbed his eyes and patted around on the dresser, finding his glasses

he slowly slid them on his face and looked at the clock, 7:30 AM

he groaned and turned over, his eyes foggily landing on pete, who was sitting next to him, eating a piece of toast

"why." Patrick mumbled

"why what?" Pete asked, reading the news paper

he had most likely been up all night, judging by the bags under his eyes

"why are you eating toast in bed?" Patrick forced himself to sit up

Pete shrugged, "that homeless man that showed up to all of our shows was found dead this morning."

"that's highly depressing." Patrick rubbed his eyes with his long cold fingers, pushing his glasses up and down along to the rhythm of his hand

"yeah." Pete handed patrick his toast

"Pete." Patrick chuckled to himself, finishing the toast

"I'm gonna shower."

Patrick looked up to the already nude pete, standing in front of the mirror

"have fun." Patrick fumbled around under the blankets, looking for his boxers

"want to join me, trick?" the bassist shot a smirk towards the blonde boy

Patrick shook his head, "I'm gonna go for a walk." he slid his boxers on under the blankets and forced himself out of bed then made his Way to the dresser

"suit yourself." Pete shrugged and turned the water on

"you're always so warm, pete." Patrick smiled as pete snuck his arms around Patrick's waist from behind

"how would you warm up without me?" Pete smiled against Patrick's neck before kissing it

Patrick turned to face pete, "I love you." Patrick whispered against petes lips

"I love you, too." Pete smiled and kissed patrick before running and hoping into the shower

Patrick once again snapped himself back to reality, unintentionally

by this time he wasn't crying anymore. he found a state of numbness as he walked over to the window where he found petes cold, unresponsive body

Patrick sat on the floor and pulled a bottle of pills out of his pocket

he sighed and sat them next to him, then made his Way to the kitchen

he reached into the cabinet and grabbed petes favorite glass.

he found a bottle of water and poured just enough to swallow a few pills into the glass

he walked back into the room and sat on the floor, in the exact spot.

he took the note out of his back pocket and sat it on the bed next to him

he opened the bottle and poured about ten pills into his hand

he believed in heaven although pete didn't.

"I'm coming, my angel." he whispered and popped the pills into his mouth then chased them down with water

he laid on his back, staring at the ceiling.

about half an hour later, he started to feel very tired.

the same tired you feel after a long and taxing day.

the tired you feel after crying for an hour.

the tired you feel after you've lost the love of your life

"I love you, Pete. I still love you." he whispered with his last breath

he closed his eyes and thought of pete for the last time