I don't know what to do.
I feel so pressured by everything that is going on around me and I feel like I am constantly doubting myself. Like everything I do, I feel like I do it wrong or that I took to long to say something or that I am just being clingy or annoying, so there are times when I want to reach out and text people. But I stop myself and begin to go through all the negative scenarios where people get annoyed at me and get irritated.
You don't know the number of times that I have written a whole paragraph to someone and right before sending it, I delete it because I think who really cares. And I feel like everyone around me is going through their own shit that they don't realize when something is wrong like I could be really sad but no one ever realizes or they pretend they don't see it to not have to deal with my bullshit.
Sometimes I think that what I am feeling can't be compared to what others are feeling so I just keep it inside until I reach a point where I can't hold it in any longer and that is when I break down crying and thinking to myself. Why doesn't anyone care about how I'm feeling...
And I know that I have people who care about me like my parents, family, and friends but I don't want to burden them with what I am feeling or sometimes I just really want to talk to a person but out of fear of being rejected I don't and then I think about it later and regret it.
And even though I have a bunch of people who care about me I sometimes feel like they won't understand what I am going through or will say like get over it some people have real things going on in their life
And all I really want is to find that person who I feel like I can tell all my problems to.
And there is a person who I trust and want to tell them. But I feel like our relationship has changed. That person is ... and like I trust him completely. But I feel like I ruined our relationship when I was in London, considering everything that happened.
*I don't regret what happened, what I regret is the way we left things.*
YOU ARE READING
The thoughts of a Heartbroken Teenage girl
Non-FictionA place where I write about how I feel about a boy... If ya want you can give me kind tips
