Truth or Consequences

Center of a Storm

Gabbi POV

Even though my dad was never in the picture my Mama was, and most times she was all I needed. Our relationship wasn't perfect by any means but if I was ever in trouble or looking for advice my Mama is the one person I knew would have my back. She put my needs ahead of hers every time, for anything. If there wasn't enough food for the both of us, she wouldn't eat. If my clothes were past all hope of fixing she would go out and find me the newest clothes she could, either from a shelter or a thrift store. If I needed supplies for school she would look for donations that were available. The government helped us a little bit but it never seemed like it was enough, we were forever stuck in a state of purgatory fighting for survival. 

I'm the only child and I'm not sure if that's by choice or because of the circumstances that we're in, I do know however that I was unplanned. Growing up in the shelter however there were a lot of kids of all different ages around so it never felt like I was alone. That's one thing my Mama wanted to prevent me from ever feeling was alone. So yeah I lived in a shelter for most of my life, I'm not ashamed of it because it made me who I am today. For the most part I know how to deal with all types of people from cultures from around the world, I even picked up little phrases in different languages. Everything was going fine and dandy until I started high school. 

I was a completely different person at school than I was at the shelter. I mainly kept to myself for the most part because I really only went to school to get a degree and get out. I started off as a great student but other people just kept getting in my way. Almost everyday I was being teased and taunted about something, either my Dad, my housing issues, my Mama, anything they could find a flaw with they took it and ran with it. I never let it phase me though, at least on the outside. I just walked around on the daily looking like a mannequin, emotionless and that tended to push people away enough that I never really had friends. 

In the beginning I swore up and down that I wouldn't get caught up in drugs and drinking but here I am at 22 and at this point it would be easier to name a drug I haven't touched. As I would come down from the drugs I was on my emotionless demeanor turned into pure rage with zero regret and by my sophomore year pretty much everyone in my school knew that if they had the Blaine name coming out of their mouth that was the last time that they would be saying it. But even through all that I got my high school diploma. 

My life was a tornado and I was the eye of the storm taking out whatever was in my path. I had to learn how to defend myself because some of the situations that I put myself in my Mama couldn't drag me out of no matter how hard she tried. So even though it wasn't the picture perfect childhood I knew if it came down to a matter of life or death I know I can just look innocent by batting my long black eyelashes and bash them in the fucking face.