He's handsome, cute, and funny.
She's the same.
He's hardworking, sexy, and loving.
She's that way too.
He's a man
She's a woman.
I only like one!! Not both! Not both...
My eyes catch me looking at the women,
I do the same with men.
My heart beats just as fast with her laugh as his.
I'm only ten, what do I know of crushes,
I must be crazy for thinking a female could mean the same to me as a male...
I can't help but find her attractive,
But I won't tell my family cause I don't want to be disowned.
My aunt will freak,
My uncle will laugh,
What would my siblings do,
And how would my mother act?
Keep this stupid idea deep down,
Tucked down in the depths of your heart,
Don't EVER let it out or you'll be left alone!
But...my friend finds that girl attractive,
Same as me,
But she looks more masculine so she doesn't have any worries.
Wait? Do I want to be a man?
Should I go by Bri or Brian?
I like my hair short,
And I buy more guys clothes than women's,
And I hate my breasts with a huge passion.
That's it, maybe I am a man trapped in a woman,
That's why women are attractive to me,
But then why would men...? Maybe I'm gay? Not a lesbian?
I'M SO CONFUSED!! MY HEAD HURTS!! MY HEART WANTS TO BURST!! I'M SO LOST!! I WANT TO SCREAM BUT... I can't...
What am I?
Who am I?
What does this pain in my chest mean?
My brain keeps telling it to shut the hell up and fade away,
But do I really want it to?
I'm so confused,
But I'm only eighteen,
So maybe I don't know much about life,
Just like the adults say,
Just like the adults say...
I'm nineteen and I keep hiding away my pain,
If I cover it with a jacket,
If I don't care what I look like,
If I just ignore it, I'll feel better...
But I don't...
I saw a dress the other day that made me happy, but if I'm a man then why?
Makeup is intriguing,
Perfume is perfect,
And the daisy dress in the back of my closet looks so cute - wait, cute? - and comfy.
Am I really a man trapped in a woman's body?
Am I?
No. I am a woman,
Who prefers Bri or Brian,
And I like to wear makeup,
And comfy summer dresses.
I am more of a tomboy then a girly girl,
But the pain in my chest is the truth I've hidden much too long.
I tell my sister and she just smiles,
She says she always had a feeling I was keeping a secret even from myself.
I tell my friends,
One of them calls me an inspiration,
My joy could not be higher.
But now I have to tell my mother,
Finally see how she'll react,
And when I'm ready for hate and disownment,
She throws love and support at me.
I'm flying on air,
Dancing on clouds,
But now I must face the pain,
The secret locked away.
When I confront it,
Finally after nine years,
I look at the reflection of myself in the mirror,
And admit to myself,
He's handsome, cute, and funny.
She's the same.
He's hardworking, sexy, and loving.
She's that way too.
He's a man
She's a woman,
And that's okay, because I love both.
