Star Trek: TNG: Q's Day Out

Chapter Two

What on Earth?! Q thought to himself loudly. The thoughts were so very loud that he actually thought, for a brief yet terrifying moment, that he had spoken his thought out loud. Luckily though, he had not.

He glanced down at himself and saw that he was wearing something. Thank god for that, he said to himself gratefully. It was the red and black uniform of a Starfleet captain. He quickly came to the concerning and annoying realisation that he was lying down. He sat up and saw that he was lying on a couch. It was made of pristine, white leather. He looked around the room in which he had found himself in. It looked quite cosy and neat. There didn't seem to be a single thing out of place. Not one piece of straggling rubbish scattered here nor there or a crumb on the wooden floor. There was an odd looking box in one corner. It was black and thick and quite large. It had two wires protruding out of it which resembled, very clearly, antennae. In a way, that is what they were. It was a television set.

He was just about to stand up when he heard footsteps coming from somewhere. Already scared and confused basically out of his actually non-existent wits, he stayed where he was. He listened more intently and heard that the light footsteps were actually coming closer. Wanting to see who or, indeed, what it was that was making the annoying noise, he sat up on the couch.

Roxana Philippe stepped out of her bedroom and yawned loudly. She walked through the hallway and made her way into the living room. What she saw next was so very puzzling and frightening that she could find no words which she saw fit to describe it. She didn't scream, she didn't speak, she didn't yell in a state of confusion or terror, she just stood there.

"Who are you?" She managed to get out the three trembling words as she walked over to the intruder so that the two were a little bit closer.

Q stood up and said proudly and impertinently, "I am Q."

She stuttered, "Q? Q?"

He sighed annoyingly and said, "Yes, I've already said that."

"How did you get in here?" She asked him, sounding scared all of a sudden.

"I have no idea!" Q replied, sounding rather jovial and nonchalant about the whole confusing matter.

She gingerly and carefully took another step towards him. "What do you want? Are you a burglar, or are you going to kill me?" She asked him, being terrified.

He let out a short and confusing chuckle. "Why on Earth would I want to do that?"

She shrunk back a little.

"Moving on," Q said, changing the subject already. "You're not from France are you?"

She shook her head and replied quietly, "No."

Q smiled a smiled full of glee. "Oh, thank god for that!"

"Do you not like French people?" She asked him, puzzled by his response.

"Not especially. I had this friend once who was French and I could never put up with him. So close minded." Q tutted and shook his head disapprovingly.

Roxana asked him slyly, "Are you sure it wasn't him that couldn't put up with you?"

"How dare you?" Q started rudely. "Why would you say that?"

"Well, if appearing magically on someone's sofa is how you usually say hello, then you can't really blame them," she replied logically.

He nodded, saying, "True, true."

"You're not an alien are you?" She asked him worriedly.

"What makes you think that I am?" He asked her.