It Was Always You

Chapter Eight

I found myself smiling despite just being broken up with as I walked up to Benji's door. It's weird how thinking about him made me smile when not too long ago thinking about him hurt.

Sure, it hurt so much to be away from Alec, but that doesn't mean I can't be happy for just a second. Just a second before remembering what happened.

And I had to face him again tomorrow.

I wanted to get out of that apartment so badly that I had just decided to get the rest of my stuff a different day. I had thought that Alec was just making another irrational decision, but on my long walk to Benji's I started getting worried that that wasn't the case.

So now, I was going to gather the rest of my things tomorrow. And I was nowhere near ready.

I reached Benji's door and knocked. Almost immediately, the door opened to reveal Benji looking at me sadly.

     "Come on in."

     I forced a smile at him. "Why are you looking at me like that? I'm fine?"

     He closed the door behind me and in the blink of an eye pulled me into a hug.

     "Jey, I know you better than that. I can see right through that fake smile."

     I sniffed and smiled sadly, clutching Benji tightly. "I can't believe he broke up with me. After everything, he broke up with me." I whispered in disbelief.

     "I know, ba- Jorge." I felt his head shake slightly on my shoulder. "Do you want to talk about it?"

     I pulled away from him, revealing the tears streaming down my face and the wet spot on Benji's sweatshirt. I shook my head quickly.

     "Let's sit down. Do you want anything to drink? Or eat?"

     "No thanks, I'm fine."

     Benji sat down on the couch next to me and I told him what had happened when I got home. Occasionally he would take my hand or put his arm around my shoulders, and, honestly, it felt great to have him back in my life and there to comfort me.

     Once I finished there was a short silence, but then Benji spoke.

     "Honestly, what an asshole. He doesn't deserve you. You didn't deserve to be broken up with."

     I snorted. "Oh, but I deserve to be cheated on?"

     "Jey-"

     I nudged his shoulder and laughed. "I'm kidding, idiot. I'm over it."

     He looked down at his hands. "That wasn't okay for me to do. I don't deserve to be forgiven."

     I snorted again. "I haven't forgiven you. You really fucked me up, Benji. I wasn't able to trust anyone because of you. I was depressed for so long. But, I've moved past it. That was the past, this is now. I'm glad you're back in my life."

     He smiled sadly. "I'm really sorry. And I'm glad you're back in my life, too."

     I giggled like a child and curled up against his chest. "Thank you for letting me stay here."

     He ran his hand through my hair and started playing with the wavy black locks. "Of course."

     I started drifting off quickly, and I must have started dreaming pretty fast, because I could have sworn I heard Benji say, "I still love you, Jorge."

* * *
    
     Ooo. Tea.