My Friends' Phanfics

The Zoo Fic

Dan and Phil were on a day out. They were out, because they were "out". Finally together without the worry of being discovered.

They were at the zoo. Dan was looking at the llamas - of course - and Phil was gazing upon the lions. He thought that the lions were brave.

Suddenly, Phil called Dan over to where he was. Dan curiously followed. He looked inside the lion enclosure and couldn't believe his eyes. There was a llama in there but Dan wasn't worried about the llamas safety, as the llama was getting ferociously banged by a giant lion. And it was enjoying it!

Dan felt something inside of him. Metaphorically of course. He leaned over to Phil and whispered into his ear with a soft husky breath.

"The symbolism is just too much," he grinned. Phil twitched, but not in a place you could see.

They knew what they had to do.

Phil said quietly, "Let's get in the car, Dan." Dan looked around.

"It's not too busy today..." he replied.

They both nodded, ignoring the old grandma in the corner (who was reading 50 Shades of Grey anyway).

Phil put his hands out and helped Dan over the top into the lion enclosure. Dan got so carried away that once he was over, that he started to make out with the glass. Phil, however, with his almost supernatural strength, jumped over the top by himself and pulled himself into the lion enclosure. With a thud, he met with his human llama-like lover.

Dan was cleverly wearing his llama hat to disguise himself as one of the animal kind. The llama seemed to be getting rowdy.

Phil (now completely butt naked as the old lady watched intensely from just above her book) noticed the llama's interest in his lover's cock and glared at it with a challenging look. The llama, not the dick.

Unfortunately, Dan seemed to like the llama. He was licking his lips intensely. Phil had to get Dan's interest back.

All of a sudden, it was like they were in a Pokemon battle!

Llama used it's ugly but cute charm.

Phil evaded.

Phil swung his digeridoo round in circles.

Llama was paralysed.

Phil started to shake his anaconda in the llama's face.

Llama ran.

Phil won this battle, earned 250xp and Dan's interest.

Seeing it's sadness, the lion followed the llama away from the scene where they continued fucking, just away from the naked humans.

Phil - with his mind powers - asked Dan if he was okay with him frickle frackling up the bummity bum bum hole really really hard with his big long really really hard tinky winky. Dan was okay with that, so Phil started frickle frackling Dan up the bummity bum bum hole using his big long tinky winky. Of course, they were both so enjoying it. Phil was growling and roaring and Dan was making weird bleating noises.

Soon, the reached their finishing point and as they did, they flew back over the fence in a miasma of rainbows and joy. They didn't have time to grab their clothes as two security guards came running around the corner. The old grandma from earlier pulled the two stark naked wet boys onto her back and quickly ran away into the distance.

It was a good day.

A/N

so this is the kind of thing that my friends are capable of creating and i am going to go cry now. goodbye.