(I'm introducing Nolan's online diaries, this might be the only one I do if y'all don't like it(: just lmk!)
TW: MENTIONS OF SUICIDE, MANIA, ETC.
january 3, 2014
the first thing my mother said when i was born was "he has blue eyes." she had blue eyes. i get sad whenever i think that she was already searching for something we had in common from the moment she saw me, even if i was her first born. fun fact- all babies have blue eyes at birth. mine ended up turning color. the first thing she thought we had in common was gone. little did my mom know that we had something more in common.
when i was a kid, my grandfather told me that my mom had manic depression. one day my mom would tease and tickle me until i almost peed myself from laughter. and others, she would scream at me for no reason at all. her outbursts were horrifying and i was so tired of taking them personally. now i know it wasn't my fault. so typical, i had mommy issues. along with undiagnosed bioplar disorder.
january 5, 2014
it all went downhill my senior year of college. my dad had up and left my mom. my mom began taking special interests in guns and threatening my father with suicide. she ended up needing her stomach pumped.
january 11, 2014
it's been a long week.
i was studying at my best friends house when my dad showed up to tell me that my mom had just killed herself. for months, i was completely numb until one day i just crashed. cue my first manic episode. completely unable to function, i dropped out of high school. my dad made me sit through intense psychological evaluation, and i left that building with a prescription and a twelve page pamphlet on dealing with bipolar disorder.
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LOVING IS EASY! T. CHALAMET
Fanfiction"please don't change a single little thing for me." the beginning and the end. timothée chalamet x male oc copyright riverholland
