Shizaya-Seeing Right Through You

Chapter 11

"He's worried about you." Shinra said as he stared at the still shocked information broker; Izaya slid his back down the wall until he was sitting on the white floor. He wrapped his arms around his knees and brought them close to his chest.

"How could he be worried about me? He hates me." Izaya said, he actually felt like crying right now but he was Orihara Izaya...he couldn't cry over this.

"Well maybe seeing you in so much pain is making him rethink his thoughts about you, in my theory he thinks of you as some kind of monster that can live forever. But seeing like this is making him think you really are just human and have emotions like this, and so does he. All I know is that he wants me to do everything I can to keep you from dieing."

"...Is that so...why is he so hard to figure out? Usually I would have seen this coming if it was anyone else, but he's so much harder to understand. Maybe it's because he's not as smart as most humans, or maybe it is because he really is just a monster...I'd give anything to know what was going through his mind right now." Izaya said aloud, he hugged his legs tighter to his thin body until he could feel his ribs digging into his knees.

"Well I think he needs a little time to cool down; he probably doesn't know where he is emotionally or mentally with you. For now I want to focus on keeping you healthy, and right now you're about to die of hunger." Shinra said, crossing his arms across his chest; Izaya stretched his leg out against the floor and rubbed his aching stomach.

"Shinra....I want all the fatty tuna you can get."

Ikebukuro...

"This is so fucked up, why am I worried about that bastard?" Shizuo thought to himself as he bought himself another pack of cigarettes and started to take a drag of one. He was furious at himself for caring abut the flea and he was even madder when he started to want to go back to Shinra's to see if Izaya was doing ok.

"Maybe I just need to sleep all this off, it is pretty late." The blonde crushed the newly lit cancer stick under his foot before walking back to his apartment. He didn't even bother changing into more comfortable clothes once he got into his apartment. He kicked off his shoes and collapsed onto his bed, it didn't take long for him to drift off to sleep after snuggling under the warm blankets.

"Shizu-chan." Izaya whimpered as he was hugged by the bodyguard, they were curdled up in their bed together as Izaya cried like a child. Shizuo knew he was in pain from that day so he did everything he could to try to comfort his lover, kissing the raven's head lightly he pulled his closer into his warm embrace.

"It's ok Izaya, I'm here now." Shizuo said, Izaya sniffled and wrapped his arms around the large male's body. He was actually feeling a lot better since he knew he was safe now, he rubbed his eyes on the back of his hand and lets his have lidded eyes look up at the blonde.

"I love you Shizu-chan." Izaya sighed as a few more tears rolled down his cheeks, Shizuo kissed them away and smiled at the small informant.

"I love you to flea." Shizuo said, holding the no longer crying Izaya close to his heart.

"GAHH!" Shizuo woke up in a cold sweet as he panted heavily from the dream he had just, he ran his fingers through his messed up hair and took a deep breath. He was burning under his clothes so he quickly stripped out of everything except his boxers; he fell back on the bed and stared up at the ceiling. Part of him wanted to go back to sleep to continue with his dream but the other part of him wanted to just stay awake...and not relive that dream of being with that bastard flea...holding him close.

"Dammit...dammit this shouldn't be happening to me! I hate the damn flea, after everything he's done why shouldn't I hate him?" Shizuo thought angrily, why did he care so much what happened to the flea? Maybe seeing Izaya so weak like that really messed with his mind...

"Ahhhh! Stop thinking about it!" Shizuo yelled as he sat up in the bed, he didn't give a damn if he had woken up his neighbors with his angry screaming. After he calmed down a little he took in a deep breath and laid back down in his bed, he really was overtired at this point and he would have to get up soon to meet up with Tom. Just sitting there and having arguments with himself wasn't going to solve anything.

"I'll deal with it in the morning..." Shizuo thought, he kept telling himself that until he was finally able to fall asleep.

The next day...

"Is everything ok Shizuo-kun? You look like you've got something on your mind?" Tom-san asked as the two walked to their first appointment of the day.

"Yea everything fine, what happened to Kasuka has really been bothering me lately." It wasn't a complete lie; he was really worried about his baby brother. But that bastard flea was the one who was on his mind at the moment.

"I would have thought you would be a lot more relaxed considering Izaya hasn't been around Ikebukuro for days now." Tom said as he took another sip of his coffee, Shizuo didn't answer. He was already thinking about the flea enough he didn't need to think about him more. Even after hours of throwing random guys half way across Tokyo, Shizuo still found himself thinking of a shaking crying information broker.

"That'll be all for today Shizuo-kun, there really is no one else I need to meet up with today." Tom said as he counted the money that was shaken out of a very terrified old man. The blonde just nodded and started off in the direction of a certain underground doctor; after a few minutes of walking he finally got to the apartment.

"Hello Shizuo! What bring you here?" Shinra asked as he greeted a very disturbed bodyguard, Shizuo entered the small apartment and sat down on the moderately comfortable couch.

"I think I have some sort of brain damage." Shizuo blurted out, Shinra looked at him confused before sitting down next to the blonde.

"Oh? Why do you think that? Did you hit your head on something?" Shinra asked curiously, the blonde just shook his head and took in a deep breath.

"It's what I've been thinking of; I can't stop thinking about Izaya. It's driving me insane that he's the only thing that's been on my mind for the past few days." Shizuo said angrily as he ran his fingers threw his bleach blonde hair.

"Well after your little 'episode' yesterday I've been trying to figure out why you've suddenly have some interest towards Izaya-kun's well being. I think for you to see Izaya so weak and venerable is so un-natural that you don't know how to react to it. There's nothing wrong with you, it's only human that you react that way. But you won't need to worry about seeing Izaya so weak and helpless anymore, so don't worry too much about it." Shizuo's eyes widened when he ran the last sentence the doctor had said threw his messed up mind.

"What do you mean...did he die?" Shizuo asked, he actually started to feel a bit nervous waiting for the answer.

"Huh? No of course not! After last night he's just...Izaya now! He's acting like his old, messed up in the head self!" Shinra laughed.

"But isn't that a bad thing? We've been spending all this time to try and change him."

"Yes I know, but him being his usual 'Izaya' self is keeping him sane. I really don't think he'll be going near Kasuka anymore and I think he got all the bad memories out of his system. I told him if he ever needed to talk he could come over any time and if he'd rather talk to a professional I could give him the numbers of some great therapists."

"....He's still here right?"

"No, I let him go home a few hours ago." Shinra almost jumped out of his skin as the blonde stood up angrily from where he was sitting.

"You let that psycho go? What the fuck Shinra?" Shizuo screamed angrily.

"W-well you should have seen how he was...I really think his punishment is over so I let him go back to his home. He seemed really happy about it..." Before Shinra could say anything else Shizuo had ran full speed out the door.